Pokemon: 100 Ways To Destroy Team Rocket
by Sonata-Time-Nocturne-Flare-Aoi
Summary: Chap. 37 is now up! Admit it, by now the continued presence of Team Rocket may have gotten on your last nerves by now. Now here's your chance to see the duo be humiliated, owned, and destroyed in any way you please. Tell us their fate and it shall be done! Rated T for violence and language.
1. 1: Death by Rocket Launcher

**Story**: Pokemon: 100 Ways To Destroy Team Rocket  
**Author**: Time Master  
**Written**: April 2008  
**Genre**: Humor  
**Rating**: T (Anything Could Happen…Seriously)  
**Disclaimer**: I do not own Pokemon, nor am I solely responsible for the misfortunes that are about to be laid upon this duo.

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Ah, Team Rocket…who doesn't know about them? You know…those three idiots who constantly fail to capture Pikachu, fail to do anything worth their boss's attention, and fail to permanently blast off and never be seen again? Yeah, you know who I'm talking about.

Well, folks, this is your chance to have your way in disposing, humiliating, and owning these two reoccurring nuisances and their talking cat Meowth, all in 100 different incidents!

Let's start it off!

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**#1) Death by Rocket Launcher**

Team Rocket were in their trademark Meowth-like hot air balloon floating over Pallet Town ready to launch a genius plot upon Ash and Pikachu.

"**Look, there it is! That's where that brat Ash lives,"** James says, pointing down at the home not too far from them.

"**Tell me again why we're here?"** Meowth asked.

"**Well, my sources informed me that Ash Ketchum is back home right now visiting his mother, and Pikachu was last seen sleeping outside in his backyard,"** Jessie explained.

"**So we're going to swoop in, swipe up Pikachu, and be on our way!"** James added, while putting together a robotic arm machine he'll use to grab Pikachu.

"**Heheh, finally, after months of failed attempts, we'll finally get what we want and get away with it!"** Jessie says with an eager tone.

"**Meowth, that's right!"** Meowth proclaimed.

The balloon descends upon the yard, and just as Jessie expected, Pikachu was lying on the grass taking a nap.

As Team Rocket were about to make their move…

_**KABLAAAAAAAMMMM!**_

…they were blown to bits by a military-issue homing rocket.

The explosion woke up Pikachu, who sat up and sees Ash walking out of his house carrying a smoking rocket launcher over his shoulders.

"**Pika!"** Pikachu says as he happily runs over towards Ash.

"**Hey Pikachu! The plan was a success! I knew Team Rocket would fall for our trap,"** Ash said, satisfied for a job well done. **"Come on, let's clean up their remains before Officer Jenny arrives at the scene of the crime."**

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**Oh how I wished I could do that for real...anyway now it's your turn! Send us your ideas and suggestions via a review and we'll make it happen! This fic will be updated twice a week! So let the chaos begin!**


	2. 2: Humiliation by Interrogation

If Rocket Launchers weren't bad enough, how about being humiliated to the max? This next scenario goes out to the author ShadowKing1988 in:

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**#2) Humiliation by Interrogation**

Jessie, James, and Meowth were hiding behind a bush along a forest pathway, scoping out for some rare Pokemon they could snag up and show to their boss.

"**See anything yet?"** Jessie asks James, who was looking about the area using a pair of binoculars.

"**Not a Pokemon in sight!"** James said as he continued to look. **"Hey, wait a minute…"**

James' attention brings him several feet down the forest path, where he spots an oversized Pikachu casually out for a walk.

"**It's…it's a giant Pikachu!!"** James said excitedly.

"**What?! A giant Pikachu?!"** both Jessie and Meowth piped up simultaneously.

All three members were now fighting over the binoculars to get a glimpse of this giant Pikachu James spoke about. Once they each got a good look at it, a wide grin spreads across each of their faces.

"**That's incredible! If we catch that giant Pikachu, our boss would be so proud of us he'll give us riches and we could finally retire!" **Jessie said, a daydreamy expression on her face.

"**Well what are we waiting for? Let's jump it!"** Meowth said.

All three members immediately hopped out from behind the bushes and began to advance toward the giant Pikachu, all the while preparing to call out their own Pokemon to fight it.

"_**ALRIGHT GIRLS, TAKE THEM DOWN!"**_

From out of nowhere, a couple dozen Officer Jenny's jumped out at them from all sides and tackled them to the ground. Meanwhile the giant Pikachu turned out to be another Jenny in disguise. She takes off the costume and approaches the downed Team Rocket.

"**Team Rocket, you are hereby under arrest for your countless crimes upon the people and their Pokemon worldwide,"** Officer Jenny said to them while placing them in cuffs and hauling them off to the nearest Police HQ.

An hour later, Jessie, James, and Meowth were sitting behind a table inside a small interrogation chamber. Standing across from them was the same Officer Jenny who arrested them earlier.

"**This can't be happening…"** James muttered to himself.

"**Alright, now let's get down to business! Whom do you three work for?"** Officer Jenny questioned, slamming her hands on the table in front of them.

"**We aren't talking, especially to you!"** Jessie said to her angrily.

_**SMACK!**_

Both James and Meowth were wide-eyed at Jessie getting bitch-slapped hard by Officer Jenny.

"**Now, I'll ask again! Whom do you three work for?"** Officer Jenny demanded.

"**She said none of your business! Now let us go!"** James responded.

_**WHAP!**_

Officer Jenny smacks James upside the head for that comment.

"**Don't make this any tougher then it already is…"** Officer Jenny warned.

"**Hmph! Tough talk for a cop, especially a flat-chested one!"** Meowth insulted.

_**SMAAAAACK!!**_

Meowth's rude comment was enough to make Officer Jenny slap him hard enough to send Meowth flying out of his chair and into the back concrete wall.

James, who gulped at the now pissed-off Jenny, sees a small red light in the corner of the room. **"Hey, what's that?"** he asks.

"**That's a video feed of this interrogation, which is being broadcasted live around the world as we speak,"** Officer Jenny says.

The members of Team Rocket all look at each other with a panic-stricken expression.

The interrogation, (and constant slapping) would last for twelve straight hours until they finally gave in to Officer Jenny's demands.

Without a doubt their reputation was destroyed for sure.

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**That's another one down! Now you see how these work! I supply a bit of back-story to the event, and then add your suggestions to make it complete! Who's idea shall I pick next? Please review, and keep those suggestions coming!**


	3. 3: Death by Machine Malfunction

I'll tell you one thing: I wouldn't want to be bitch-slapped on national television, nor do I want my Pokemon-catching equipment going haywire on me. This next scenario goes out to the author Omentuva in:

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**#3) Death by Machine Malfunction**

"**What about this one?"**

**"Nah…we've used that one before…"**

**"Search harder! There's gotta be something we can us to snag Pikachu with!"**

It was a rainy day, and Jessie, James, and Meowth were inside a warehouse in an undisclosed location, searching through their stockpile of machines and gadgets they use whenever they want to grab rare Pokemon. After an hour of sorting through tons of failed and used devices, Meowth came across a rather unique-looking robotic device.

"**Hey! What is this thing?" **Meowth points out, lugging the light-weight, human-sized robot out from amongst the other junk.

"**Oh that…it's a prototype James built a while back that's suppose to aggressivly catch Pokemon on command,"** Jessie explained.

**"Unfortunately it's yet to work like we want it too,"** James added. **"I tell it to do something, but it does something random instead."**

"**How do you control it?"** Meowth asks.

"**Oh, you can make it work by either voice command, or using virtually any remote device near it,"** James said.

Shortly after James spoke, Team Rocket heard voices from outside the warehouse.

_"**Dawn, Brock! How about we rest here inside this warehouse until the rain stops?"**_ said Ash's voice from outside.

_"**Good idea! I'm getting soaked!"**_ Dawn responded.

The three Team Rocket members all look at each other with wide grins on their faces.

"**This is too god to be true! Here's our chance to sucessfully steal their Pokemon for once!"** Jessie said.

"**Shall we go and ambush them?"** James asked.

"**I've got a better idea! Why don't we use this machine you built instead?" **Meowth suggested.

"**Meowth, I told you already, it doesn't work properly! It's unreliable!"** James reminded him.

"**I don't care! Let's just use it already! It's got to do something worthwhile!"** Meowth said sternly.

Jessie and James look at each other, then sighed.

"**Fine…just flip on the switch,"** James instructed Meowth.

Meowth did just that. One turned on, the light across the robotic machine's eyes glowed a dim red, ready to go.

At that very moment, the large warehouse doors slide open, and in came Ash, Dawn, and Brock.

It wasn't long before they saw Team Rocket standing before them in the middle of the place.

"**What?! Team Rocket?! What are you three doing here?"** Ash said in annoyance.

"**You've stumbled into our reserve of Pokemon-snatching equipment, and now you're going to get it!"** Meowth said.

"**With that said…Prepare for trouble…"** Jessie begins.

"**And make it double!" **James adds.

"**To protect the world from--"** Jessie continues with their motto…

_**KABLAAAAAAM!!**_

…until the robot suddenly explodes for no reason sending Team Rocket flying across the warehouse at high speeds as all three crash into the pile of metallic equipment, killing them instantly.

Ash, Dawn and Brock all stare in disbelief at what happened.

"**Um…we didn't see anything…right guys?"** Ash says to the others.

"**Right!"** Dawn and Brock replied simultaneously.

The three heroes turn and quickly leave the warehouse.

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**ALTERNATE ENDING!**

At that very moment, the large warehouse doors slide open, and in came Ash, Dawn, and Brock.

It wasn't long before they saw Team Rocket standing before them in the middle of the place.

"**What?! Team Rocket?! What are you three doing here?" **Ash said in annoyance.

"**You've stumbled into our reserve of Pokemon-snatching equipment, and now you're going to get it!"** Meowth said.

"**With that said…Prepare for trouble…"** Jessie begins.

"**And make it double!"** James adds.

"**To protect the world from--"** Jessie continues with their motto…

Jessie, James, and Meowth's motto is interrupted when they turned around and saw the robot starting to act very erratic.

"**What the?! What the heck is that robot doing?"** Meowth asks.

"**I don't kn--GAAAHHHH!!"** James said, before the robot suddenly lunges toward him, grabbing him around the neck as it proceeds to spin him around and toss him across the warehouse, with James crashing into the pile of sharp, pointy electric devices.

"**Uh oh! This isn't--WAAAHHH!!"** Jessie yelps, as the robot then proceeds to grab Jessie by the hair and use it like a rope and choke her with it unit she turned black and blue, passing out shortly after.

"**Yikes! James was right!" I'm outta h--YEEEOW!!"** Meowth screeched as the robot then reaches over and grabs him by the tail and proceeds to slam him back and forth onto the hard cement floor, before chucking him through a glass window on the side of he warehouse.

Ash and Brock stare at the incident with total disbelief.

"**What…what just happened?" **Ash said, aghast at the event that had taken place.

It wasn't long until they both noticed that Dawn had just finished messing with her Pokedex, missing the entire beat-down of Team Rocket. The robot then shuts down shortly after.

"…**What happened? Did I miss something?"** Dawn asks.

"…**Maybe…her Pokedex had something to do with the robot going nuts? Remote control maybe? Just a guess…"** Brock said, scratching his head.

"**Oh well…now that they're gone, let's rest up!"** Ash says to his friends.

"**Right!"** Dawn and Brock replied simultaneously.

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**Ouch…I don't know what's worse…Team Rocket's stupidity to use the unreliable machine or** **Dawn's obliviousness** **to the whole situation…Anyways, stick around! Who's idea shall I pick next? I think I'll go in a random order from now on…**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming!**


	4. 4: Death by Snorlax

Crazy-ass defective robots should not be used…period! Things are about to get heavy in Team Rocket's next misfortune. This next scenario goes out to the authors Mossnose and ReaderADV, and the anonymous reviewer Ri2 in:

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**#4) Death by Snorlax**

Team Rocket were in their hot-air balloon floating over the land returning from another failed attempt to capture Pikachu, when they saw an interesting sight in the distance.

"**Hey…what's that on the edge of that cliffside?"** Meowth asks.

A large rare white Snorlax was lying asleep near the edge of a very tall and steep cliff.

"**Do you see that? A white Snorlax! Do you guys realize how hard it is to find one of those?" **James said to his comrades.

**"Well it can't be too hard if its just lying there in plain sight..."** Meowth comments, rolling his eyes.

"**Quick, take the balloon over toward it, it's going to be ours!"** Jessie said, pulling out a spare Pokeball from her pocket as James altered the direction of the balloon.

Team Rocket's hot air balloon approaches the white Snorlax, stopping several feet from it.

"**Come to us, Snorlax!"** Jessie announces, throwing her Pokeball at the giant sleeping Pokemon…

**_BOING!!_**

…Only for it to bounce off of it and drop down into the valley below.

"**Oh shoot! That was my favorite Pokeball! We must get it back!" **Jessie says to James and Meowth.

"**Do we have to?"** James asked, not really wanting to go fetch it.

"**Yes we have to! Now come on!"** Jessie insists.

The balloon descends down into the valley and lands at the foot of the cliff. They get out and grab the Pokeball.

As they did this, the white Snorlax high above them rolled over in his sleep…

…right off of the cliff.

As they prepared to leave the area, Meowth noticed a strange shadow increasing in size that was spreading around them.

"**Huh…what the?"** Meowth said, looking up, James and Jessie now doing the same.

The white Snorlax was soon about to drop right on top of them.

"**YEEEEEEK! RUUUN!!"** all three yelped as they quickly made a mad dash toward a small cave within the cliffside.

Once inside they waited for the white Snorlax to crash-land onto the ground outside.

But…it never happened.

Jessie, James, and Meowth all look at each other with a look of confusion of their faces.

"**I don't get it…it should have hit the ground already!"** Meowth commented.

"**Should we take a look?"** Jessie asked.

"**It wouldn't hurt I suppose…"** James responded.

The three slowly stepped back outside, looking up toward the sky.

No white Snorlax.

They all look at each other once more.

"**Weird…oh well…"** James said. **"Let's get on out of h--"**

**_BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!_**

Out of nowhere the white Snorelax crashes upon Team Rocket, their arms and legs twitching as it stuck out, lying trapped underneath the large Pokemon.

They would be stuck underneath it until it woke up…a week from now.

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**Heheh, adding a Looney-Tune-ish spin to this scenarios outcome was quite interesting on my part! More smashing-goodness will return in future chapters!**

**Don't forget, if you have submitted multiple ideas, rest assured I will try to use all of them throughout the countdown!**

**(Or at least all that I am familiar with so I'd use them properly...)**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming!**


	5. 5: Ownage by Giovanni's Persian

Being smashed by a heavy-ass Pokemon…what could be worse than that? Oh wait…I know! This next scenario goes out to the author Spidey3000 in:

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**#5) Ownage by Giovanni's Persian**

Team Rocket was very happy at the moment.

Exuberant actually…

They had finally captured a rare Pokemon.

They were now inside Giovanni's Office, their boss sitting in his chair petting his Persian as the members of Team Rocket stood before them.

"**So you've finally done something right for a change?"** Giovanni asks, a bit of doubt in his voice.

"**Oh yes boss! You see, we finally captured a very rare Pokemon for your collection!"** Jessie said excitedly.

"**Meowth! That's right! You won't be disappointed!"** Meowth responds.

"**Is that so? Well let's go take a look at it then,"** Giovanni says, getting up out of his chair while his Persian leaped onto his seat in his place. Giovanni escorts Jessie and James out of his office, while Meowth decided to stay behind. Meowth then approaches Giovanni's Persian and looks at him with a devious smile.

"**Heheh, just you wait you stupid cat! Once Giovanni sees what we have captured, I'll be the one in his lap, and you'll be thrown out like trash!" **Meowth said to him.

The Persian growls at Meowth at the comment he made.

Minutes later, Jessie and James walk back into their boss's office to get Meowth.

"**Meowth! You won't believe this! Our boss is giving us a huge bonus for our capture!!"** James said enthusiastically. **"…Meowth?"**

**"Where could he be?"** Jessie asks.

Both Jessie and James walk over toward Giovanni's desk, and looks over it.

"**YAAAAAHHH!!"** both members yelled, as they saw their boss's Persian munching on Meowth, with Meowth's tail sticking out of his mouth.

Jessie and James were horrified at the sight. The Persian merely slurps up the rest of Meowth in response.

"**YOU SPIT OUT OUR BUDDY RIGHT NOW YOU BAD CAT!!"** James yells out at the Persian.

The Persian did not like his attitude either, and immediately jumps at James and starts mauling his face.

"**Not the face…NOT THE FACE!!"** James yells as he runs around the office trying to de-claw the cat of him, only to crash through the office's 20th story window, with the Persian leaping back inside, leaving James to fall to his demise.

"**Uh oh…uh…nice Persian…no need to get hostile now…right?" **Jessie says nervously, backing up as the Persian began advancing toward her next.

Later, Giovanni returns to give Team Rocket their money, only to see them gone.

"**What? Where are those three? Did they leave? Oh well, no money for them,"** Giovanni says, as he walks by his fireplace, not noticing Jessie hung up above it like a fishing trophy.

Giovanni's Persian merely smiles at his accomplishments for the day.

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**Cats…are…EVIL!! And Persians are no exception!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming!**


	6. 6: Death by Chocolate

Well, you know the old saying: ridicule killed the cat…wait…that's not right…anywho, this next scenario is from yours truly in:

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**#6) Death by Chocolate**

Team Rocket slowly trudged along the beaten path, looking pretty disheveled and down-in-the-dumps.

"**What a crummy day…first we get electrocuted half-to-death by Pikachu, then our boss refuses to give us our paychecks until we catch a rare Pokemon…"** James said glumly.

"**And now we're starving!"** Meowth added.

"**Where in the world are we going to find something to eat out in the middle of nowhere?"** Jessie asks before sighing.

The three suddenly stop as they all witnessed a candy bar lying in the middle of the path.

"**Is that…candy?"** James asks.

"**Meowth! Let's check it out!"** Meowth suggests.

The three members quickly head over toward the candy, with Jessie grabbing it first.

"**It's a chocolate bar! Oh how I loooooove chocolate!" **Jessie says, with a sparkle of passion in her eyes and voice as she began to unwrap the candy.

"**I guess things aren't as bad as we thought it would be!"** James says.

"**So Jessie, how about giving us a piece of that candy bar you have there?"** Meowth asks.

Jessie slowly turns around, and to James and Meowth's dismay, Jessie had already eaten it all, as the outside of her mouth was completely covered in chocolate.

"**You hustling hussy! Hording all the food for yourself?"** Meowth said angrily, unleashing his claws.

"**You are so heartless, leaving your own teammates to suffer while you gorge yourself in chocolate!"** James added, fists clenched.

"**Get her!!"** Meowth called out.

Both James and Meowth jump Jessie, as all three began pummeling the hell out each other over a single candy bar. The fight got so intense, however, that they eventually resort to using their Pokemon on each other until all three were obliderated from each other's relentless attacks.

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**ALTERNATE ENDING!!**

The three suddenly stop as they all witnessed a candy bar lying in the middle of the path.

"**Is that…candy?"** James asks.

"**Meowth! Let's check it out!"** Meowth suggests.

The three members quickly head over toward the candy, with Jessie grabbing it first.

"**It's a chocolate bar! Oh how I loooooove chocolate!"** Jessie says, with a sparkle of passion in her eyes and voice as she began to unwrap the candy.

"**Hey look, there's more!"** James points out, as there was a trail of candy bars continuing down the road.

Team Rocket takes this opportunity to follow the trail of chocolate bars, when…

"**OH MY WORD!!"** Jessie squeals loudly.

Team Rocket was face to face against a gargantuan mountain of candy bars that sat in an open field in front of them.

"**This is a dream come true! Now we won't go hungry!"** Meowth said happily.

"**Let's dig in!!"** James says.

All three dive into the mountain of candy bars and began scarfing down the delicious chocolate.

**That Evening…**

Ash, Brock, and Dawn were at a nearby Pokemon Center, waiting for their Pokemon to be treated, when a news bulletin appeared on a nearby television screen.

"_**Next on tonight's local news: We are at the site where a young man, woman, and a Meowth were found dead in the middle of an open field. According to a doctor's autopsy, it would appear that these three victims overdose themselves on chocolate, which may explain why each of them weigh nearly 700 pounds each. We will bring you more updates when it comes."**_

"**Uh…say Dawn…wasn't that the place where you dumped all of those candy bars you couldn't sell this morning?"** Brock asks.

"**Oh yeah…I dumped them there because nobody seemed to like the 'Quadruple Chocolate Fudge Brownie Ripple Overload' bars my fundraiser was selling…"** Dawn responded.

"**I don't blame you…each one of those bars contained 12,000 calories and 26,000 grams of cholesterol…"** Ash added.

"**Oh well…what else is on?"** Brock asks, flipping the station.

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**Hunger leads to insanity…and insanity leads to over consumption. Elementary stuff, right?**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming!**


	7. 7: Death by The Fullmetal Alchemist

**Author's Note**: Thank you everyone who have read and reviewed thus far! Your continued support is greatly appreciated! Onward with the Team Rocket bashing!

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I'm a female, and truthfully I'm not a big fan of chocolate…(Shudders). This next scenario is from the anonymous reviewer Jarkes in:

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**  
#7) Death by The Fullmetal Alchemist**

Team Rocket was wandering the countryside, on their way toward the nearest city to rest and freshen up after failing to locate any decent Pokemon to steal. Meowth, who was in charge of leading them back toward civilization, had one thing to say after an hour from leaving their hot-air balloon, which stopped working some time ago…

"**Guys…I think we're lost…"** Meowth said to both of them.

"**Lost?! What do you men lost? Whose idea was it to navigate us to the nearest city?"** Jessie says angrily.

"**Yours…"** both James and Meowth said simultaneously.

Now feeling like an ass, Jessie sighs, then increases her walking speed, now ahead of the two as she began climbing up a small hill. Once at the top of the hill, she spots something that made her very happy…and then very confused.

"**Hey you two!! There's a city in the distance! A……desert……city….?!"** Jessie said, her words grinding to a halt.

James and Meowth rush up the hill to see the city as well. They too see a city, surrounded by sand as far as the eye could see.

"**What the…what's a desert nation doing out here near the countryside?"** Meowth asks.

"**You're asking us? You're the one who lead us here,"** James responded.

"**Well…no matter, I suppose, let's go and get a room, I'm beat,"** Jessie said.

James and Meowth shrugs and follows suit.

**Inside The City**

As the trio wanders the sandy streets of the desert city, they spot an inn in the distance.

"**Ah, there's a place we can rest. Let's go!" **Jessie said eagerly.

As all three of them start dashing toward the inn, a blonde-haired kid with a metallic arm steps out from a nearby alley…

**CRASH!!**

…colliding into him within seconds.

"**Hey! Why don't you watch where you're going?"** the blonde-haired kid says to them, getting off of the ground.

"**Hey! It's not our fault some pipsqueak like you got in our way!"** James shot back.

"**WHO ARE YOU CALLING A MINISCULE TINY LITTLE SHRIMP?!"** the kid yells back at them angrily.

"**Jeez…does this kid have a height issue or what?"** Meowth says.

"**Insult me again? Well I'll show you three!" **the kid says, clapping his hands together in front of him, before slamming his hands against the stone wall of a nearby building.

Suddenly, the ground around Team Rocket began to rumble.

"**What the…what's going on…" **James asked, a bit spooked at the situation.

Suddenly out of nowhere, a large stone fist shot out of the building's wall…

**CRUUUNCH!!**

…punching James straight across town with enough force for him to crash through two homes down the street.

"**OH CRAP!"** Meowth yells. **"JUST WHO THE HECK ARE YOU?!"** Meowth says in shock.

"**I'm Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist, and you're going to pay for calling me a pint-sized insect!" **the blonde-haired kid said.

"**Hey! I didn't say anything about you being a pint-sized, microscopic thing or whatever…." **Jessie protested…

**CRUUUSH!!**

…**.before Edward uses his alchemist powers to create a wall of stone to crush Jessie like a pancake into another building.**

That just left Meowth, who was now running for dear life down the street…

**stomp….Stomp….STOMP!!**

…when a gargantuan stone statue stomps around the corner of a tall building, stopping to look down on the tiny helpless Meowth.

"**THIS IS SO UNFAIR!!" **Meowth yells…

**STOOOOOMP!!**

…as he is then stepped on by the giant statue.

After that, Edward sighs with satisfaction. Then, his younger brother, Alphonse, who wore a large suit of metal, came out of a nearby alley and approached him.

"**Brother! What just happened here?"** Alphonse asks.

"**Some two jerks and their talking cat called me short, so I taught them a lesson,"** Edward responded.

"**Jeez brother...you really need to work on your anger issues when being called short, even if you are a tad shorter for a teen your age,"** Alphonse responded, sighing.

"**Yeah well, nothing more we can do here. Let's go,"** Edwards said, as he and his brother left the area.

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**  
And today's moral is: Never call The Fullmetal Alchemist short in any way, shape, or fashion, or he just might hurt you….a lot…especially if he's having a bad day…**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! I'm eager to see even more ideas!  
**


	8. 8: Death by Sniping

Heheh...this won't be the only occasion Team Rocket encounters The Fullmetal Alchemist…heheheh… This next scenario goes out to the author Maverick Hunter Cyros in:

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**#8) Death by Sniping**

"_**Look, there they are!"**_

"_**We'll get em' for sure this time!"**_

"_**Meowth! This is our best plan yet!"**_

Team Rocket were peering out of an alley of a large bustling city, taking advantage of a very rare opportunity to capture Ash's Pikachu, who for some odd reason was roaming the streets alone.

"**This is just too good to be true! Can you believe how foolish for that Ash brat to not keep tabs on his Pikachu?"** Jessie says, a devious smile spreading across her face.

"**Who knew that Pikachu, alone and unprotected, would be so close to us?"** James adds, while quickly putting together another one of his enumerable Pokemon-catching gizmos.

"**Here he comes, get ready James!"** Meowth says to him.

However, James didn't respond…

**FFFFFT…THUD!**

…all the was heard was a faint whizzing sound, then James's body falling to the ground.

"**Huh?"** Meowth said as he turned and saw James lying on the ground, bleeding, a bullet through his head.

"**WAH!!"** Meowth yells, darting up to Jessie, clinging onto her face in fear at what he saw.

"**Meowth?! What are you doing?! Get off my face!"** Jessie growls, pulling him off and tossing him behind her. **"James, is that gizmo finished yet?"** she asks, her eyes still fixed on Pikachu out on the street

**FFFFFT…THUD!**

Another faint whizzing noise, followed by the sound of someone, or something hitting the ground happened seconds later.

Jessie turns around to see what was going on…

**"AAAAAAHHHH!!"**

…to only see her partners had been shot, James in the head, and Meowth in the…unmentionables…

Jessie immediately shot against the walls of the alley, now frantically looking around to see who was shooting at them.

She could see nobody who could be doing this nearby.

"**A sniper…a damn sniper is after us…I gotta get outta here...!"** Jessie whimpers, slowly turning her head to see if she could find cover down the alley if she made a break for it…

**FFFFFT…FFFFFT…FFFFFT…CRASH!**

…too late.

The sniper gets Jessie too. One bullet in the ass, the other in the face, and the third one through her chest.

Minutes later, Pikachu is seen running up the stairs on the side of a very tall building, where he meets up with his trainer Ash, who was now putting away his sniper rifle.

"**Good work keeping them distracted, Pikachu,"** Ash says to Pikachu.

"**Pika-pi!"** Pikachu says with a grin.

"**Man, who knew long range weapons were so useful. Let's go buy some more,"** Ash says, packing up his sniper kit as he and Pikachu exit the rooftop.

* * *

**ALTERNATE ENDING!!  
(Dontcha just love 'em?)**

Minutes later, Pikachu is seen running up the stairs on the side of a very tall building, where he meets up with his trainer Ash, who was also with the three other men who gunned down Team Rocket: Lee Harvey Oswald, John Wilkes Booth, and Vice President Dick Cheney.

"**Thanks guys for taking care of Team Rocket for me,"** Ash says to the three men, handing them a huge wad of cash each for their work.

"**Anytime kiddo. If you need us again, just give a call,"** Dick Cheney said as he and the other two left the rooftop shortly after.

* * *

**Do these guys even have a gun permit at all? Ah well, who cares!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! Only 92 scenarios to go!**


	9. 9: Humiliation by Wacky Substance

I'd be scared too if I was shot at by Ash or even history's most notorious gunmen (Dick Cheney included). I'd also be rather embarrassed if someone acted rather stupidly in front of a large audience or even myself. This next scenario goes out to the anonymous reviewer monogatari in:

* * *

**#9) Humiliation by Wacky Substance**

In another unnamed city, Team Rocket was currently in pursuit of Pikachu down the crowded streets. Pikachu weaves in and out of the crowds trying to evade the trio.

"**Get him! Don't let him get away!!"** Jessie yells as she shoves past the pedestrians, with James and Meowth following from behind.

Further down the street in a laboratory, two scientists were standing by an open window holding a flask of chemicals.

"**It's no use, we've tried this new compound on our Pokemon and it doesn't seem to do anything! It's a useless concoction,"** the first scientist said.

**"Then throw it out then, we have no use for it anymore,"** the second scientists stated.

Back outside, Pikachu stops in front of the scientist's building to take a brief break from running. Soon, however, Team Rocket caught up to him in no time.

"**We got you now Pikachu! Give it up!"** Meowth said, closing in on the tired yellow Pokemon.

Just before Team Rocket could snag Pikachu, the two scientists from the building next to them toss out the flask of chemicals. It breaks as it hits the ground, spewing out a purple gaseous substance all around Jessie, James, and Meowth. Pikachu takes the opportunity to flee the scene.

"**H-hey!! What the?!"** James exclaims, coughing from the plume of gas.

"**What is this stuff!? I'm starting to feel weird…"** Jessie states.

"**I don't feel any different…"** Meowth says.

Once the smoke cleared, both Jessie and James had a very goofy look on their faces.

"**Uh…are you two alright?"** Meowth asks.

Jessie zips up to Meowth and grabs him, hugging him tight.

"**Awww…what a nice soft creature you are!! You're as soft as a pillow!"** Jessie says, snuggling Meowth so hard it was nearly choking him.

"**What the?! What's with you all of a sudden?!"** Meowth proclaims.

James, who was now in a French Maid's outfit, floated by Meowth, cleaning everything around him with a feather duster.

"**I feel so beautiful!! Time to clean this messy street!"** James said in a singsong voice.

Meowth had a 'WTF' look on his face at the moment.

"**Hey you guys! Quite goofing off and let's go nab Pikachu for crying out loud!!"** Meowth yells at them.

The crowds of people in the streets began to take notice of Jessie and James's strange hijinks as they started to gather around them.

"**Would you like a batch of fresh cookies?"** Jessie asks, holding a pan of cookies to Meowth as she broke out into a kooky laugh.

"**Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na- Na-BATMAN!!"** James yells, now running around wearing a Batman costume.

Meowth's mouth was hanging open is disbelief at the stupid actions of his partners.

"**Why…is this...happening…?"** Meowth says, an eye twitching from the embarrassing scenes.

The crowds around them began laughing and taking pictures at the team's display of idiocy.

Meowth then realizes that the gaseous substance that spewed about them must have been what was making Jessie and James act stupid.

"**Ah man…how much longer do I have to endure this…"** Meowth mumbles.

"**EVERYBODY DO THE MACARENA!!"** both Jessie and James proclaim to the audience, now dancing in front of them.

"**Oh wow, so these guys are members of Team Rocket? They're no thieves, they're just a bunch of losers!"** someone yells from the crowds.

Unbeknownst to Team Rocket, their boss Giovanni was watching them via satellite TV, his face beet-red with anger and emberrasment from what he was watching.

The trio would never hear the last of it from anyone anywhere once the effects wore off.

* * *

**Embarrassing much? Maybe amusing is more like it! Where's my camcorder…**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! A super-special chappie is coming up next! Don't miss it!**


	10. 10: The Bates Motel Incident

**Author's note**: Hey everyone! Miss me? I guess I left you all hanging for long enough! Let's continue shall we? This next event I'm sure you'll enjoy even more if you've seen the classic movie 'Psycho'!

* * *

Crazy gaseous potions should be disposed of properly…except when Team Rocket is nearby!

It's time for a special installment of this countdown! Every ten scenarios you will see a super special scenario that combines many ideas from you and myself into one zany incident! So without further ado, this next scenario goes out to the authors Ri2, Spidey3000, Maverick Hunter Cyros, goldeneye101, the anonymous reviewers Reviewer and Jarkes in:

* * *

**#10) The Bates Motel Incident **

The Team Rocket trio were driving down a deserted road in the middle of nowhere in the dead of night. It was raining very hard, and James, who was driving, was getting fatigued from trying to maneuver in such awful weather.

"**Come on James, let's pull over and take a break. I think we're lost anyways,"** Meowth says to him from the back seat.

"**Well we wouldn't be lost if weren't for a crappy navigator such as yourself!"** James shot back to Meowth. **"We finally bag-up a ton of rare Pokemon and we wind up in this deserted area! Nice going,"** he added, sticking his tongue at Meowth through the rearview mirror.

"**Oh put a sock in it you two. I think I see a place where we can stay up ahead,"** Jessie says, squinting as she looked through the soaked windshield in front of her.

James drives up to the area Jessie pointed out.

It was a motel, and it seemed like there were some rooms available.

"**Bates Motel? What kind of funny-name for a motel is that?"** James asks.

"**Who cares? Let's go in, I'm beat!"** Meowth says, hopping out of the car.

James and Jessie followed suit, leaving their bag of Poke' Balls full of rare Pokemon in the trunk.

**Bates Motel: Lobby **

Inside the motel's lobby, the trio rang the bell, waiting for the manager to show up.

To his or her surprise, someone unexpected rose up from behind the counter.

"**WOBBA WOBBA!!" **

It was a Wobbuffet.

"**What the?! What's a Wobbuffet doing here running this dead-end motel?"** Jessie asks.

"**WOBBA WOBBA…WOBBUFFET!!"**

Meowth, who could understand what other non-talking Pokemon say, translates.

"**He said he's the new owner of this motel after his previous caretaker, Norman Bates, was arrested for doing some pretty psychotic stuff last week,"** Meowth says.

"**Oh?"** both Jessie and James said, looking at each other.

"**Well, no matter, put us up for the night!"** James said.

Wobbuffet saluted the trio and pulls out a motel log book and began flipping through it.

"**WOBBA WOBAA! WO…WOBA…WOBBA WOBBUFFET!!"**

"**What's it saying?"** Jessie asks Meowth.

"**He said 'Hmm…let's see…the Elrics are in Room #1…M.C. is in Room #2…ah! Here you go, you three will take Room #3,"** Meowth translated.

Wobbuffet then gave them their keys to their room.

With their keys in hand, the three began walking to their room.

"**Hmm…I wonder who this M.C. person is who's staying here…and why does the name 'Elric' sound familiar…"** James wondered out loud.

**Team Rocket's Room **

After getting themselves comfortable, they were ready to split up and go their separate ways.

"**I could use me a shower, though its sort of lame that there is only one public shower in this place, but oh well,"** Jessie said, slipping on her robe and heading out into the hallway.

"**It's stopped raining, I think I'll go outside and take a look around this place,"** James said, heading out the room behind Jessie.

"**And Meowth will look around this motel for a bite to eat,"** Meowth said, leaving the room last.

**The Elric's Room **

Inside Room #1, Edward Elric (The Full Metal Alchemist) and his brother Alphonse, were sitting on the bed admiring the Philosopher's Stone, an item they've been wanting to get for the longest.

"**Finally! After all this time, we have the Philosophers Stone in our possession!"** Edward said with a wide smile as he inspects the stone. **"Too bad we had to stop by this dump on the way back to our home,"** he added.

"**Brother, we should go celebrate for our findings!"** Alphones replied.

"**You're right. Let's go find someplace we could eat around here,"** Edward said, the stone still in hand.

Both boys stand up and head for the hallway.

Once they stepped out though, they accidentally trip over Meowth…

**_CRASH!!_**

**_...SHATTER!!_**

…causing both boys to fall over onto the ground, and the stone as well, which broke into a million pieces upon hitting the hard floor.

Both Elric boys were both in complete shock at their stone being destroyed.

"**Hey! Why don't you two watch where you are going?"** Meowth said angrily to them.

Edward slowly turned his head toward Meowth, with a scary expression of anger and revenge on his face.

"**WATCH WHERE _I'M_ GOING?! YOU'RE THE ONE WHO CASUALLY WALKED IN FRONT OF OUR DOORWAY! NOW LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE YOU STUPID CAT!!"** Edward shouted angrily at Meowth.

"**Hey wait a minute…you're those two guys who attacked us back in that desert town a couple chapters ago!"** Meowth said with a gulp.

**"Hey, its that talking cat! What should we do with him, brother?"** Alphones asks._** "And how the heck did he survive my brother's attacks that day?" **_he thought.

An evil look spreads across Edward's eyes.

Wasting no time with words, Edward clasps his hands together, and slams his palms onto the floor around the broken shards of the Philosophers Stone, using his alchemy powers to do something wicked to Meowth. A red light shot out from the floor around Meowth, engulfing him for a few seconds before disappearing.

Meowth looked around and snickered.

"**Meowth! Meowth Meowth!"** Meowth spoke.

He then suddenly stops and stares at them in horror.

"_**OH NO…MY VOICE…WHY CAN'T I SPEAK HUMAN-SPEAK?!"**_ Meowth thought to himself._** "OH, THE HORROR!!"**_

Meowth turned around and ran away from both boys, wailing a despairing **'MEEOOWWWTH!'** as he went.

"**Um, brother, what did you exactly do to that talking cat?"** Alphones asks.

"**Um…beats me..."** Edward responded, scratching his head for he didn't know exactly what he did to Meowth either.

**The Shower **

Meanwhile, Jessie was in the only shower in the hotel, bathing while singing the Pokemon theme song horribly off-key.

Unbeknownst to her, someone meanwhile was entering the shower room.

The shower room suddenly turned black and white for no apparent reason.

"**Huh? What happened to the color? Oh well…"** Jessie said, continuing to sing and shower.

From Jessie's point of view, the shadow of that mysterious person crept closer and closer to where she was bathing. Whoever it was, that person was holding something sharp in its hand.

Jessie then turns around, finally noticing the person in the same room with her.

"**Huh? James, is that you?"** Jessie asks.

No answer.

"**Hey...wait a minute…what's that in your hand…AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!"** Jessie screamed, as the person began to stab her repeatedly with its weapon, the sound of high-pitched violins shrieking in the background.

After the stabbing, the person revealed himself to be Master Chief, the hero from the FPS series Halo.

"**That's for keeping me awake with your god-awful singing!"** Master Chief said to her, before leaving the area, the shower still falling upon Jessie's bloodied body.

**Outside The Motel **

Outside the vicinity, James walks around seeing the sites.

It wasn't long before he spotted a large house not too far from the motel that sat on a hill.

"**Hmm? I wonder who lives there?"** Jessie said, heading toward it to investigate it.

**An Hour Later… **

About an hour later, a ton of police cars arrive at the motel. Several Officer Jenny's pile out of the cars and swarm the area.

In no time, the Elric brothers were escorted away from the motel.

"**What's going on here? We didn't do anything!!"** Edward said to an Officer Jenny.

"**Relax, young man. We're just getting you two out of the area while we search for a trio of Pokemon thieves known as Team Rocket,"** one of the Jenny's explained.

"**And its all thinks to our little private investigator: Wobbuffet!"** another Jenny adds.

Minutes later, yet a different Officer Jenny came to report to the head Officer.

"**Officer! We have recovered the stolen Pokemon from the thieves' getaway vehicle! We have also located the bodies of two of the three members of Team Rocket. The female member, Jessie, was found stabbed to death by some unknown assailant,"** she reports.

As she spoke, Master Chief sneaks by all of the police officers quietly using a cloaking device to make his escape.

"**As for the feline Pokemon Meowth, it is concluded that he hung himself, due to this letter we found of him saying how cruel it is not being able to talk again,"** the Officer continued. **"That just leaves the male member of the trio: James."**

As if on cue, James was seen running from the house on the hill, wearing a flowered dress.

"**How the heck did I wind up wearing this!?"** James asks, with a 'WTF' look on his face.

"**FREEZE! COME QUETLY WITH YOUR HANDS UP!!"** the lead Jenny says to him on her megaphone.

"**YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!"** James shouted back, turning to run around the side of the house…

"_**AAAAAAAAEEEEEEEIIIIIIIII!!"**_

…which wound up being a cliff, in which James fell to his demise.

And that was the end of Team Rocket…for now.

* * *

**ALTERNATE ENDING!! **

"**That just leaves the male member of the trio: James."**

As if on cue, James was seen rung from the house on the hill, wearing a flowered dress.

"**How the heck did I wind up wearing this!?"** James asks, with a 'WTF' look on his face.

"**FREEZE! COME QUETLY WITH YOUR HANDS UP!!" **the lead Jenny says to him on her megaphone.

**"YOU'LL NEVERTAKE ME ALIVE!!"** James shouted back, turning to run from them.

"**SHOOT HIM DOWM!!"** commanded the lead Officer.

**BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!**

Several gunshots rang, all hitting James as he now slumps to the ground in a bloody mess.

"**Good work Vice President Dick Cheney!"** the lead Officer said to Dick Cheney.

"**No problem ma'am, just doing what I can to serve the country,"** said Cheney with a cheesy smile as he lowered his rifle.

* * *

**Betcha didn't see all that coming, did ya!**

**That concludes the first ten chapters! It's now to switch gears and change up some of the elements of this fic!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! Your idea just may be used next!**


	11. 11: Ownage by Lucario Gang Up

Too bad Team Rocket never watched the movie Psycho, otherwise they might have lived through the whole ordeal…well okay, maybe not, but still...ah screw it...

Encountering a group of Pokemon could prove to be dangerous. Really, it ain't pretty. I'll show you in this next scenario, which is credited to the authors Dance to the Music Miror B. and Green.Day232072 in:

* * *

**#11) Ownage by Lucario Gang-up! **

It was sunny in the mountainous region of Sinnoh.

All seemed fair-the-well, well, for most people, except for one particular trainer.

Paul, one of Ash's rivals, was on his way to enter into a local tournament.

It wasn't long though until a well-known trio of Pokemon thieves confronted him.

While Paul was walking along a trial, Team Rocket sprang out from behind a large bush and blocked his advance.

"**Who the heck are you losers? Out of my way!"** Paul said to them with a disgruntled tone.

"**Ha! Not a chance! We won't move until you hand over your Chimchar!"** Jessie said to Paul.

"**For your information, I abandoned that weak Chimchar of mine a week ago!"** Paul said to them in a 'matter of fact' tone.

The trio looks at each other with much disappointment.

"**Oh well, no matter, just give us any Pokemon you have on you or else!"** Meowth threatens him.

"**You want my Pokemon? You'll have to answer to my new partner first,"** Paul responds, arms crossed.

"**Oh? And who would that be?"** James inquired.

Paul turns his head to behind him.

"**Lucario, come here!"**

Within seconds, a Lucario approaches Paul from behind and stops by his side.

"**A Lucario? Is that the best you can do? We' bag that Pokemon in no time!"** Jessie said.

"**Ahem,"** Paul says, signaling his Lucario to pull out a metal baseball bat from behind its back.

"**A baseball bat? You call that intimidating?"** Meowth says with a snicker.

Paul's Lucario steps forward toward Team Rocket…

…and whistles.

Suddenly, two-dozen Lucarios who sprung out of nowhere, all wielding metal baseball bats, surrounded Team Rocket.

"**Attack!"** Paul commands.

"**Uh oh…"** all three Team Rocket members say in unison.

**SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH! SMASH! BAM! WHACK! CLANG! CRACK! SWACK! SMASH! CRUNCH! POP! CRUSH!………………………… …………………………… ………………………………………………… …………………………………………………………………CRRRRRAAAACK!!**

After the beating, all of the back-up Lucarios fled the scene, while Paul's Lucario went back to his side.

"**Hmph, losers…"** Paul simply said, as he continued his journey, leaving the smoldering pile of the beaten Team Rocket members as if nothing happened.

* * *

**Today's lesson? Don't #&#!# with Paul, fool!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming!**


	12. 12: Ownage by Chuck Norris

**Author's note**: Thank you everyone for the awesome support thus far! You all rock! A special congratulations on the anonymous user da-man82 for making the 100th review on this story, which is also the highest number of reviews we've gotten on any given story we've written to date here at this site! For that, I am going to make your idea, da-man82, the main focus on the upcoming #20 Special event in this fic!

* * *

Lucarios and baseball bats, when combined, have an unfortunate tendency to have hurtful results.

Team Rocket is at it again trying to steal Paul's Pokemon in this next segment, which is dedicated to the authors Lord Kupo. and Aelsthla-Mental in:

* * *

**#12) Ownage by Chuck Norris **

Paul was taking a break up near the peak mountain range of the Sinnoh region. He sat by a tree along a path and ate his lunch.

It wasn't long though before Team Rocket once again confronted him.

The trio strode up toward Paul out of nowhere. James grabs him by the collar, and pushes him against the tree, while Jessie and Meowth prepared to grab their Pokeballs.

"**Ugh, you guys again! What do you want now?!"** Paul said, a bit miffed of their return.

"**We're going to succeed in stealing your Pokemon, you brat!"** Meowth said to him.

"**Geez, you guys are pathetic, harassing a guy like me,"** Paul said to them.

"**You got that right, runt! No one can help you now!"** Jessie said with a devious smile.

"**Funny you should say that…"** Paul said in a 'matter of fact' manner.

"**What do you mean?"** Meowth asks.

"**You see, I got backup with me!"** Paul says to them, before turning away from them. **"You can come out now, Chuck!"**

Immediately from around the corner, Chuck Norris walks out and stands next to Paul, wearing blue jeans, a white shirt, brown jacket, and cowboy boots and hat to match.

All three Team Rocket members had horrified looks on their faces upon Chuck's entrance.

"**Guys, I'd like you to meet my uncle Norris,"** Paul says to them.

"**Oh crap! I heard that Chuck Norris doesn't use Pokeballs to catch Pokemon, rather the Pokemon jump into the Pokeballs to hide from him!"** Meowth says shakily with a gulp.

"**I heard that when Psychic Pokemon try their powers on Chuck Norris, they always end up passing out into a coma!"** James said with a worried look.

"**I read somewhere that Legendary Pokemon come out of hiding only when Chuck Norris isn't nearby!"** Jessie said, sweating like a glazed pig.

"**You know, these Chuck Norris jokes have gotten old. Now I really have reason to teach you three a lesson,"** Chuck says to them.

Without further ado, Chuck preceded to charge toward Team Rocket. Before the trio of Pokemon thieves' could even turn away and run…

**WHUPOW!!**

…Chuck uses his famous roundhouse kick to send Team Rocket flying over the mountains.

"**Thanks uncle,"** Paul said to Chuck.

"**Anytime nephew. Now to get back to Texas and serve up some more justice,"** Chuck said, making his leave.

Both of them return to their normal routine, blatantly ignoring the huge-ass hole in the mountain where Team Rocket ended up landing.

* * *

**Today's lesson? Don't mess with Chuck either!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! I'm eager to hear from you all!**


	13. 13: Death by Rocks

Who knew that Paul was related to Chuck Norris!

The quest to steal Paul's Pokemon continues in this next segment, which is dedicated to the author Mossnose in:

* * *

**#13) ****Death by Rocks **

Paul was down at the foot of the mountain now, just leaving a nearby Pokemon Center to let his Pokemon rest and rejuvenate while he went to explore the surrounding area.

As he expected, Team Rocket would eventually test their luck again in attempting to snag Paul's Pokemon.

Paul was alongside a river when Team Rocket emerged from the waters and quickly surrounded him.

"**Look you little brat! You are going to give us your Pokemon whether you like it or not!" **Jessie says to him.

"**If its Pokemon you want, I have none on me at the moment,"** Paul simply says.

"**Wait…what?!"** Meowth says. **"What do you mean you don't have any Pokemon on you?"**

"**You idiots, there at the local Pokemon Center,"** Paul says.

"**Is that so? Well we're going to go over to this Pokemon Center and take them! How do you like that?"** James asks.

"**Go ahead,"** Paul says to them with a shrug.

The trio looks at Paul, not knowing whether to feel pleased, or just weirded out. Shaking off the thought, they smile and turn to leave.

"**Well, whatever, let's go collect our bounty!"** Meowth says to his allies.

"**Right!"** both James and Jessie reply.

The trio quickly rushes to the Pokemon Center.

Upon arriving at the front entrance, Jessie reaches for the door's handle, when she felt a small hard object bounce on top of her head.

**Doink!**

"**Huh?"** she said, looking up toward the sky.

"**Is something wrong?"** James asks.

"**Um…no, well, maybe..." **Jessie began. **"I just thought I felt something hit the top of my--"**

**CRAAAAASSSHHH!**

Jessie's words were cut short, as a huge pile of rocks (and a coconut) suddenly rained down upon the Team Rocket, crushing them under its massive weight.

Moments later Paul arrives at the scene of the accident.

"**Heh, just as planned,"** Paul says, looking above the entrance to the Pokemon Center's rooftop, where Paul's formerly abandoned Chimchar sat.

It would appear his Chimchar cut the rope that dropped the builders upon Team Rocket.

"**Heh…maybe you are worth having around after all,"** Paul says, a rare smile spreading across his face.

* * *

**INTERVENTION!!**

**Team Rocket**: Hey wait a minute!

**Time Master**: What, what is it?

**Jessie**: If I may remind you, this segment was supposed to be about pelting us with rocks, not having a bunch of boulders dropped on us!

**Time Master**: And may I remind YOU, that another one of the author's ideas involved having something heavy dropped on you three, am I right?

**James**: Oh yeah, you're right…

**Meowth**: Oh well, never mind, I think we should go then…

**Time Master**: Hey, you forgot something!

**Jessie**: Like what?!

**Time Master**: (Pelts them to death with a bunch of small rocks…and a coconut)

**Team Rocket**: x.X

**Time Master**: Heh, idiots…

* * *

**Today's lesson? Devious trainers and their mischievous monkeys make for an unlikely, but effective team…**

**…Oh, and authors rule!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming!**


	14. 14: Death by a Horde of Pikachu Fangirls

Heeheehee. Rocks, gotta love em!

The relentless task to steal Paul's Pokemon continues in this next segment, which is dedicated to the authors Dance to the Music Miror B. and Ri2 in:

* * *

**#14) ****Death by a Horde of Pikachu Fangirls **

Paul was down at the foot of the river training his Pokemon with various exercises.

As expected, Team Rocket were up to their no-good schemes once again.

Hiding amongst some shrubbery, the trio plots their next move.

"**You have that giant net ready?"** Jessie asks James.

"**Got it right here!"**James responds, showing her and Meowth his special mechanized Pokemon-catching net.

"**Good! Now let's go nab Paul's Pokemon and hightail it out of here before something bad happens again!"**Meowth says.

"**Okay then, let's get ready! One...two…"** Jessie starts counting off.

Suddenly, Team Rocket's attention was immediately diverted when out of nowhere; Ash's Pikachu walks in front of them, aimlessly wandering the area.

"**W-what?! Are we seeing things?"** Jessie asks, her mouth hanging open in surprise.

"**I see it but I don't believe it!! James, quick! Nab it now!!"**Meowth commands.

"**Um, right!!"**James says, immediately scooping up Pikachu with ease.

**"We got him! We finally got him!!"** Jessie cheers with delight!

**"Oh yeah! Forget about Paul's lame Pokemon! Let's get out of here and get to our boss!"**Meowth says with delight.

However, before the trio could flee the scene, they were immediately caught by a large group of girls who quickly surrounded them.

**"Huh? Hey! Who are you?"** James asks the mass of young girls, who all wore Pikachu-related shirts, hats, shoes, and other various merchandise.

**"We're members of the biggest Pikachu fanclub in the world, and you should be ashamed of yourself for picking on our poor little Pikachu!"** said one of the girls.

**"You've got to be kidding me! What we do is of no concern to you, now beat it!!"** Meowth tells the girls.

**"C'mon girls, let's show these meanies not to mess with a Pikachu!"** said another girl.

Immediately every fangirl pulls out a Pokeball and throws them toward the ground…

…and out came dozens of Pikachus.

**"Whoa! Just look at all of those Pikachus!!"** James said.

**"Yeah, but I don't think they're very friendly though…"** Jessie says.

**"Attack!!"** the entire mass of fangirls yell simultaneously.

Team Rocket is instantly assaulted by the horde of Pikachus, being beat-up and/or electrocuted while Ash's Pikachu escapes the net, safely returning to the hands of the fangirls.

**"You're safe now!!"** Said a fangirl, cuddling the Pikachu.

**"Yeah! Let's get you back home to Ash where you belong!"** said another.

**"Pika!"** Pikachu responds with delight.

Just moments before the trio was finished being clobbered, Paul eventually hears the screams of agony several feet away out of view.

**"What the heck was that just now?"** Paul says with slight curiosity.

He shrugs off the thought and continues his training sessions with his own Pokemon.

* * *

**Today's lesson? Fangirls…S-C-A-R-Y!!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming!**


	15. 15: Humiliation by James's Pokemon

Fangirls rule!! I know that for a fact because I'm one too!  
(Just keep this between you and me alright? Good!)

We are halfway through this ridiculous saga involving Team Rocket and Paul. The idea of this next segment is dedicated to the anonymous reviewer, Reviewer, in:

* * *

**#15) Humiliation by James's Pokemon **

It was nighttime.

Paul was lodging at a local inn, and was asleep in his room.

Outside of his window awaited the three stalkers who wish to steal his Pokemon.

**Jessie: "H-hey! Who are you calling stalkers?!"**

**Time Master: Um…You?**

**James: That's just rude! Who do you think you are?**

**Time Master: Your supreme commanding author, now continue the story before I sic those fangirls back on you again!**

**Meowth: Ack! Okay okay!!**

James slowly rises up to the window outside Paul's room. Inside he notices Paul sleeping, while his Pokeballs sat on the dresser next to his bed.

"**I see the goods, and I have a plan to get them,"** James says to his comrades. **"I'll summon one of my Pokemon, lift the window open, and let my Pokemon sneak in and swipe the kid's Pokeballs! It's a foolproof plan!"** James explains.

"**I certainly hope so, I'd hate to hear the backlash from our boss from failing to capture Pokemon from a sleeping preteen…"** Jessie responds.

"**Come on and do your thing, we don't have all night!"** Meowth says to James.

"**Right!"** James says, pulling out a Pokeball from his pocket.

"**Weezing, I choose you!"** James calls out, tossing out his Pokeball, summoning Weezing on the spot.

However, instead of waiting for James's orders, Weezing immediately rams into James to playfully snuggle with him.

"**H-hey!! Get off of me Weezing!! This is not the time for hugs!! Gah, you're getting smoke all over my clothes, it'll never come out!! That's it!! You go back into your Pokeball!!"** James says frustratingly, calling Weezing back into his Pokeball.

"**What was that about?"** Jessie asks, eyebrow raised from the strange display of affection.

"**I don't know, but I'll call someone else out instead. Growlithe, come out!"** James responds, tossing his Pokeball, summoning Growlithe out this time.

But just like his last choice, his Pokemon turns to him and starts playfully licking him all over.

"**S-Stop it Growlie!! You're not here to lick me like some sucker! H-hey don't lick down there!! Bad Growlie! Bad Growlie!!"** James said frantically, immediately calling back his Pokemon into the Pokeball.

At this point, both Jessie and James both began snickering at the antics of their ally.

"**Stop that!! I'll get it right this time!! Victreebel, come to me!!"** James says, pulling out a third Pokeball and throwing it, revealing his Victreebel…

…who immediately gobbled James, leaving his legs flailing in the air as he tried to get his Victreebel to spit him out.

"**Let me go Victreebel!! Quick sucking on me like a Popsicle!! Help!! Heeeeeelp!!"** James yelled from within his Victreebel.

Now Jessie and Meowth had fallen out onto the ground laughing at the failure of James's plan.

Paul meanwhile, never knew of the incident at all, for he slept through the whole affair.

* * *

**Today's lesson? Let our your Pokemon out more often, what else?!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! This is sooooo fun!!**


	16. 16: Death by Their Own Traps

James shows a lot of love for his Pokemon, no? Maybe too much…

What else could the bumbling trio possibly get themselves into? Find out in this next segment dedicated to the authors CSS Stravag, CRYSTALTEAR020, and ShadowKing1988 in:

* * *

**#16) Death by Their Own Traps **

It was a beautiful sunny day along the trails within the Sinnoh region.

Team Rocket were making their way toward the location where they believed Paul was at so they could attempt, again, to steal his Pokemon.

As they walked along the trail, they conversed with one-another on how to execute their next plot.

"**How about we run him down with a car?"** James suggested. **"That way he'll be too injured to protect his Pokemon."**

"**You idiot! You want to risk harming the Pokemon too? Besides, we don't have a car, let alone afford one,"**Meowth shot back.

"**Especially not on the salary our boss is currently giving us…"** Jessie adds.

"**Okay, we'll just steal one then!"** James suggested.

"**I don't know, it seems after 10 Seasons of the Pokemon television show, that method we keep using seems to be getting a bit stale, you know?"**Meowth contemplated out loud.

"**You're right. Stealing is overrated. We should…resort to more drastic measures?"** Jessie asks.

"**Drastic measures? What did you have in mind?"** James asks curiously.

"**Well, for starters, let's try…WAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!"**

The conversation was cut short as the trio suddenly walked over a leaf-covered, dugout pit in the road, causing them to fall through and get impaled by rows of tall, sharp spikes at its bottom.

Moments later, Ash, Dawn, Brock, and Paul rush toward the scene from down the road and look down at the now dead villains.

"**I must admit, that was clever. Those stalkers deserve it! Here's your pay,"** Paul says to Ash, handing him a suitcase of cash.

"**Thanks. It's a about time they fell through a trap hole themselves,"** Ash says to Paul.

"**By the way, whose idea was to add spikes inside the pit?"** Paul asks.

Everyone turns toward Dawn, who gave them an innocent look.

* * *

**OR, IT COULD HAVE HAPPENED LIKE THIS… **

The conversation was cut short as the trio suddenly walked over a leaf-covered, dugout pit in the road, causing Jessie and James to fall through and get impaled by rows of tall, sharp spikes at its bottom.

Meowth, however, caught onto the ledge and frantically climbed out of it.

"**Oh man!!!! This is messed up!!! What am I going to do now that Jessie and James are dead?" **said a very panicked Meowth as he looked in horror of his slain allies.

Before Meowth could leave and get some help, a large, rich-looking lady comes up to him out of nowhere and grabs him and starts hugging and snuggling him tightly.

"**I've finally found my runaway ****Meowthy-poo!!! Come here shnookums and give mommy a biiig hug!!!" **said the rich lady as she continued to smother Meowth with love.

"**H-Hey! Let me go lady!!!! I don't know who you are, but you must got the wrong cat here!!!"**Meowth said as he struggled to break free from the overjoyed woman. **"Who the heck wrote this sick turn of events into this chapter?!?!" **Meowth pleads.

* * *

**BUT WHAT IF TEAM ROCKET ANTICIPATES THE TRAP BEFOREHAND? **

Team Rocket were further up the road putting together some traps of their own after evading the pit trap back down the trail.

"**How dare someone try to make us fall into a trap that we came up with first!"** Jessie says angrily.

"**Have they no originality? Whoever thought of tying to get rid of us will be in for it this time!" **James adds.

"**Which is why we are going to plant some ****improvised explosive devices we snagged from the Police HQ after that embarrassing interrogation last week,"** Meowth says.

After setting up various bombs hidden on both sides of the trail, James and Jessie look to Meowth.

"**Okay, these are ready. Now, where did you set the trip-wire for the explosives?"** Jessie asks.

"**A few hundred feet ahead of us," **Meowth responds.

"**Good. Now Let's get to it quickly before someone else trips it—"** James says

**Meanwhile down the road…**

Ash, Dawn, Brock, and Paul were walking together, when…

**"Ow!!!"** says Dawn as she trips and falls over something close to the ground.

"**Are you okay Dawn?" **Brock asks, leaning over to help her back up.

**"Yeah, I'm alright. I think I tripped on something…"** Dawn responds.

"**Hey, look at that!" **Ash says, pointing up toward the sky.

The four watch as a small mushroom cloud appears before them roughly a few hundred feet from them.

**"Wow…I wonder what just happened ?"** Ash asks.

**"Who cares. Now let's get to the city so I can battle you and put your failed Pokemon to shame,"** Paul says to Ash, turning to leave the area.

* * *

**Today's lesson? Be wary of Karma, as it'll always come back to bite you in the ass…**

**Oh, and Dawn is still a klutz**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! **


	17. 17: Humiliation by Barney the Dinosaur

**Author's note**: So sorry for the really long gap since the last chapter, been busy with life and such, but all of that's passed and I'm ready to keep things going! Whoo-hoo!

* * *

Holes, traps, Dawn's clumsiness, oh my! While these things are extremely dangerous, nothing could possibly compare to this next horror.

The anonymous user Z suggested the next scenario in:

* * *

**#17) ****Humiliation by Barney The Purple Dinosaur **

Paul was walking through a small urban neighborhood within Sinnoh, when he stops to take a breather as he was nearing the city's Pokemon Stadium.

As you would expect, the omnipresent Team Rocket trio was waiting for their next opportunity to jump him and steal his Pokemon. Their choice of hiding this time was in a nearby playground next to a preschool.

"**You guy's thinking what I'm thinking?"** Meowth says to the other two.

"**We bum-rush that twerp and high-tail it out of here with his Pokeballs?"** James answers.

"**Precisely!"** Meowth responds.

"**So let's get a move on, shall we?"** Jessie says to them.

As the trio was about to make their move, a large, purple dinosaur appears behind them.

"**Oh hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Hello boys and girls! Are you ready for some fun?"** the dinosaur asks them in a jolly, creepy voice.

The trio spun around and faces the purple dinosaur.

"**Who they heck are you?"** Jessie inquires, raising an eyebrow at the goody-looking…thing.

"**My name is Barney, I'm from your imagination! Are you ready to learn your ABC's and 123's?"** Barney asks then in an excited tone.

"**Well uh…"** James says, at a lost for words.

Even before he could get another word out, Barney scoops up all three Team Rocket members and gives them all a big hug.

"**Won't you say you love me too?"** Barney asks them, cuddling them as he hauls the helpless trio off into his preschool.

"**Gaaaaaah!!!! Let us go! We don't have time for this…!!!"** James yells as he and the others struggled to escape his grasp.

**SLAM!!!**

All four of them then disappear inside the preschool as the door slams behind them.

Paul meanwhile finishes his break, and looks around suspiciously.

"…**Odd…I was half-expecting those three morons to have at me again…I wonder where they are?"** Paul ask to himself, before continuing on his way, unaware of what has happened to Team Rocket.

* * *

**Today's lesson? Barney has been, still is, and always will be your worst nightmare.**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! **


	18. 18: Death by Gyarados

I wonder how the trio fared being held captive by Barney for a while…

What? You think I'm worried about them? Please… they'll be fine…

Let's try something new…let's pick up where we left off, shall we?

The author **mauralucky7** suggested the next scenario in:

* * *

**#18) ****Death by Gyarados **

"**Come back! I love you! Don't you love me?!"**

**SLAM!!!**

Jessie, James and Meowth manage to escape outside from the clutches of Barney the Purple Dinosaur, as they slam the preschool's door into his face. All three of them were breathing heavily as they were glad to get out of there.

"**Who…the heck…watches that…thing anyway?!"** James pants, turning to the others.

"**I don't know…but I don't want to think about it anymore!"** Jessie responds.

"**Yeah, let's blow this joint!"** Meowth says, getting up and walking back toward where Paul might have headed.

Minutes later, the trio does indeed find their target. Paul had just entered the main city. Keeping a safe distance from him, they slowly inch their way up toward him until they get into arms reach.

They're thievery attempt, however, was interrupted as Team Rocket and Paul both suddenly stop and turn toward a large TV display outside of a store. It seemed a special broadcast was taking place.

"_**We interrupt this program to bring you a special news report! A large and deadly Gyarados has escaped from the city's local Gym. We ask that everyone to stay calm and keep a sharp eye on its whereabouts. A large cash reward will be given to anyone who can capture it and return it to its rightful owners."**_

"**Did you hear that? A large cash reward! We should go and catch it!"** James suggested to his allies.

"**Are you kidding? I'm not going after that Gyarados! We've got more important things to do, like capture this twerp's Pokemon!"** Meowth points out.

Paul then turns around towards Team Rocket upon hearing them talk.

"**What? How long have you been standing here?"** Paul inquires, eyebrow risen in suspicion.

"**Ha! You were too busy looking at that news broadcast to even notice us!"** Jessie says in a 'matter of fact' tone.

"**That's a load of crap, you were standing there watching the news broadcast too**!" Paul shoots back at hem.

"**Okay enough of this!!! Get his Pokemon!"** Meowth yells his partners.

Jessie and James were about to pull out their Pokeballs and take action, when they then felt something hot breathing on the back of their necks.

All three of them froze and look at one another, then slowly turned around.

A large dangerous-looking Gyarados, just as the news anchor described, was standing behind them, breathing down their necks while looking at them with an angry look.

All of them must have turned white with fear as they hesitantly tried to make a break for it…

**SLAP!!!**

…when the Gyarados suddenly spun around and slaps them with its tail, sending them flying down the street and colliding into a speeding transit bus.

"**Man…that's rough…"** Paul quietly comments as he watched Team Rocket's demise before turning back toward the Gyarados, who looked like it was about to attack him next.

Thinking quickly, Paul whips out a Pokeball and tosses it at the Gyarados, immediately and amazingly capturing it without fault.

"**Wow, that was easy…wonder why a Gyarados is roaming dry land in the first place…of well, time to collect my reward I guess,"** he says, tucking away the captured Pokemon and continuing his way.

* * *

Today's lesson? Um…opportunity will present itself in the strangest ways? Nah that can't be it…you think of one!!!

Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! We're nearing the next checkpoint!


	19. 19: Ownage by Holiday Gifts

Thanks everyone who has posted his or her own end-lesson for the previous situation! Great work!

It's the holidays, so wouldn't it be appropriate to do something special for the next installment?

The author abei-vofn-avjb inspired the next scenario in:

* * *

**#19) Ownage by Holiday Gifts  
**

* * *

**It was the night before Christmas…and all through Team Rocket's base  
The trio was sulking, from repeated results of disgrace  
Their boss Giovanni, cut their holiday pay  
And they were without gifts all of the day  
**

* * *

"**Man this blows. Here we are sitting here in our base with no Christmas tree or anything!"** Jessie says with a sorrowful look.

"**Back when I was with my parents, we have hundred of gifts. But now? This is pretty disappointing since our boss axed our pay for not catching any Pokemon as of late,"** James commented with a sigh.

Meowth approaches them and crosses his arms.

"**Well let's not just sit here and do nothing! We still have another chance to snag Paul's Pokemon before this particular arc is done with!"** Meowth tells them.

"**Yeah, we could, but it wouldn't feel right to steal right before Christmas, you know?"** James responds.

Suddenly, the front door of their hideout was kicked open. Team Rocket turns around to see that it was Santa Clause.

"**Santa!!!"** the trio said simultaneously in surprise.

"**Ho-ho-ho! Merry Christmas! I have come to bring you gifts!"** said Santa, opening his large red sack and gave each member an identical looking wrapped gift.

"**This is unbelievable! Imagine us getting gifts!"** Jessie said happily.

"**Thanks Santa!"** Meowth says as he cuddles his gift.

"**Ho-ho-ho! You all be good now!"** said Santa as he turns around and leaves.

All three look at each other and grin.

"**Let's opening up our gifts in the morning!"** James suggests.

"**Okay!"** Jessie and Meowth respond.

The trio sets down their gifts and head to their rooms for some rest.

* * *

**While some were sleeping  
One was still awake  
The smallest of the trio  
A gift he will take  
**

* * *

**LATER THAT NIGHT!**

That night, Meowth was still awake while the other two were snoring away. He was too excited about what was in his present.

"**I think I'll be a bad cat and open mines early!"** Meowth says as he sneaks off toward where the presents lie.

He stops in front of them, only to realize each gift looked exactly identical.

"**Oh no…which one is mine again?!"** Meowth said, darting his eyes at each gift. **"Oh well, I'll just have to open one up and see."**

Meowth grabs the present closest to him and rips it open.

It was a pair of Barney The Purple Dinosaur underwear.

"**Uh oh, that must have been James's gift!"** Meowth says with a gulp.

"**What are you doing?" **said a voice from behind him.

Meowth jumps and turns to see Jessie standing behind him, tapping her foot.

"**And just what are you doing down here…hey, is that underwear?"** Jessie says before noticing James's open gift.

"**Uh…yeah! Apparently he likes Barney!"** Meowth says, starting to snicker.

"**I knew something was wrong with James…it almost seemed like he was enjoying being tortured when that stupid Dinosaur captured us the other day!"** Jessie said. **"Oh well, now that his present is open, I think I'll open yours!" **Jessie says, grabbing another gift and ripping it open.

It was beauty shampoo for female cats.

"**Eheheh…wow…I guess the secret is out huh?"** Meowth said, turning red with embarrassment.

"**Uh, yeah…this is very fruity, Meowth,"** Jessie says with disgust.

"**Hey what's all the commotion in here?"** said another voice.

James appears on the scene.

"**Oh what the…?! That's not fair, you guys already opened your gifts!"** James says with a disappointed moan.

"**Oh relax, James, we accidentally opened each other's,"** Meowth says. **"Here, you can open Jessie's,"** he adds, handing James the last gift.

"**Oh all right,"** James says, grabbing the gift and promptly opening it.

It was a large black Looney-Tunes-like bomb with its fuse already lit.

All three of them yelled in panic.

"**What kind of sick joke is this!?"** Jessie exclaimed.

The bomb explodes, destroying majority of their home base, leaving Team Rocket charred and covered in black soot as their hideout burns.

Outside the building, Santa laughs.

"**Ho-ho-ho…Merry Christmas, morons. Hope you had a blast!"** he said, pulling off his costume to reveal it was actually Paul.

* * *

**And so ends the tale of Christmas delight  
As flames of red brighten up the night  
For Team Rocket has received such an explosive shock  
All that was planned by Ash, Dawn, and Brock.  
**

* * *

From behind, Ash, Pikachu, Brock, and Dawn join up with him.

"**Nice work Paul! You really know how to not let anyone mess with you!"** Dawn says to him, giving him a thumbs up.

"**Yeah…just don't tell anyone about me dressing up as Santa, got it?"** Paul warns them before taking off.

"**Isn't this a magical sight Pikachu?"** Ash asks.

"**Pika!"** Pikachu responds as he puts on a tiny Santa hat.

* * *

**Today's lesson?  
Never accept gifts from strangers…even if they're jolly guys in red  
He may look like the real deal, but could just be someone else instead  
Please review, and may your holidays be light  
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!**


	20. 20: Super Smash Brothers Brawl Incident

The holidays may be over, but the fun sure isn't!

It's time for another special installment of this countdown! As usual, every ten chapters you will see a super special scenario that combines many ideas from you and myself into one zany incident! So without further ado, this next scenario goes out to the authors:goldeneye101**, **Lucifer the Vampire, kirby163, Spidey3000, Maverick Hunter Cyros, and the anonymous reviewers da-man82, & Paranormal PrivateInvestigator in:

* * *

**#20) The Super Smash Bros. Brawl Incident**

Paul finally arrives at the Pokemon Stadium within Sinnoh's largest city. After registering, Paul steps out into the arena, where a gargantuan crowd of onlookers began cheering for him upon his arrival. Paul makes his way toward the center, where a long comfortable sofa sat, and in front of it, a stadium-sized television screen.

"**Paul, you've made it!!!"** said a familiar voice as he sat down.

Ash, Dawn, Brock, and surprisingly: May, approach Paul and sit down with him.

"**So you guys are my partners then? How ironic…"** Paul says, a bit surprised to see them there as well.

"**Yeah, we wouldn't miss this tournament for anything!"** Ash says.

"**And…who is she?"** Paul asks, looking at May.

"**Oh, this is May, she's a friend of ours. She signed up for this tournament as well,"** Dawn answers him.

"**I see…"** Paul responds.

**Meanwhile…**

Meanwhile outside of the stadium, Team Rocket was hastily approaching the stadiums' entrance, when suddenly Officer Jenny stops them at the doors.

"**Sorry, the stadium is full to capacity. No more may enter…HEY! You're the ones I interrogated a few weeks ago!"** Officer Jenny proclaims, immediately recognizing the trio.

"**Uh oh! You're THAT Officer Jenny, the one that kept bitch-slapping us?"** James said an uneasy smile.

"**You bet I am, just transferred here yesterday! And you're just in luck, I just received a report of the various crimes you've been commiting throughout this region on poor helpless Pokemon trainers. I have the perfect punishment for you!"** Officer Jenny says to them, immediately grabbing them and dragging them inside the stadium through the side door. Once inside, Officer Jenny orders them to step into a dark room, where she then slams the door shut and locks it.

**Back Inside…**

Back inside the stadium, the tournament was just starting.

"**Welcome ladies and gentlemen to ****Sinnoh's First Annual Super Smash Brothers Brawl Tournament! Our competitors today are Ash, Paul, Brock, Dawn, and May versus the game's CPU! Let the games begin!!!"** the announcer says, as the crowds cheer loudly while the game begins.

Paul, Ash, and Brock were first to play.

At the character selection screen, Ash picks Pikachu, Paul picks Lucario, and Brock chooses Super Mario.

The CPU opponent?

Team Rocket.

"**What the…are we inside of a game?!" **Jessie proclaims, looking through the TV screen to see the young trainers playing against them.

"**This is not fair!!!" **Meowth says, banging his paws on the inside of the screen trying to get out.

Sadly it was too late for them as the battle began. The stage chosen was 'Pokemon Stadium 2'.

"**3…2…1…GO!"**

Mario, Pikachu, and Mario appear before Team Rocket. Pikachu was charging up his electricity, Mario was cracking his knuckles, and Lucario whips out a metal baseball bat.

"**Not good!" **James yelps like a little girl, as the Team Rocket's opponents proceed to beat the trio all around the stage, smashing them out of ring minutes later.

Ash, Paul, and Brock won the first round.

"**Whoo! Good job boys, now it's our turn!"** Dawn says, as she and May grab the controllers for the next round.

At the character selection screen, Dawn picks Link and May picks Marth.

Again, the stage chosen was 'Pokemon Stadium 2'.

"**Oh no…not again!!!"** Jessie whines, as she and the other two looked like a truck has hit them twice over.

"**3…2…1…GO!"**

The next battle began, and Team Rocket was faced with Link and Marth this time around.

"**Come on you two, we gotta fight back and win this!" **Meowth says to them, as he runs up and grabs a stray Pokeball lying on the stage and throws it at their opponents.

To their horrible luck, out of it popped Goldeen, useless for an attack Pokemon.

"**Oh man…"** all three of them say simultaneously as Link picks up an assist trophy while Marth grabs a Pokeball and toss them at Team Rocket.

The assist trophy summon turns out to be Shadow the Hedgehog, who used his Chaos Control ability to slow down time for Team Rocket, while Link's Pokeball summons the spiky creature Groudon, who immediately jumps over them and starts stomping them into an oblivion.

Once again the young trainers won another round.

"**Ooh…that HAD to hurt! But being such a nice guy that I am, what say we give our CPU opponents another chance to redeem themselves?"** the announcer asks the crowds.

The crowds cheered wildly in response.

"**Okay! Let's see how Team Rocket fares against a boss opponent!"** the announcer proclaims.

The TV screen now shows Team Rocket on top of a fast moving flying ship. Out of nowhere, Ridley from the Metroid Series flies up to them and prepares for the attack, leaving Team Rocket no time to call out their own Pokemon to help fight it.

The screams of the trio made Ash, Paul, and the others cringe as they watched the carnge on screen.

"**Oooh, too bad for them! Please give a hand for the champions of this tournament!"** the announcer proclaims!

The audience cheered the names of all of the young Pokemon Trainers, the winners of this event.

"**Hey…Dawn…something's been bothering me. I don't quite recall Team Rocket as playable characters in this game…"** May says to Dawn.

"**Aw, who cares, it was all fun anyways!"** Dawn says to her with an amused smile.

This concluded the Sinnoh Saga featuring Paul.

* * *

**Today's lesson? **

**The good guys will always beat Team Rocket, even in a videogame!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! A new saga awaits, so stay tuned!**


	21. 21: Death by Crazed Shoppers

Time for the next saga: **Vacation Nightmares!**

It is time to continue on with the series! So here it is, hungry readers, the next saga of our 'Antagonists of FAIL': Team Rocket! This chapter is dedicated to the anonymous user monogatari in:

* * *

**#21) Death by Crazed Shoppers**

**Giovanni's Office**

"**Jessie, James, Meowth, I'm sending you three on vacation!"**

The members of Team Rocket were inside Giovanni's office, standing before their boss as he gave them the unexpected news.

"**Vacation?! Are you sure this is such a good idea?!"** Jessie responds, in awe and excitement of the announcement.

"**Yeah, I mean, we have yet to bring you any rare Pokemon lately…well…not yet at all that is…"** James adds, very interested in the idea of a bit of R&R.

"**Of course I think it's a good idea! You guys haven't gotten a proper break from your work since you graduated from Team Rocket Academy!"** Giovanni says, petting his Persian who was lying on his lap.

"**So where are we headed exactly?"** Meowth asks as he eyes his boss's Persian with continued disdain.

"**It's all up to you! I have here a bunch of brochures for you to look at. Heck, try out all of these places if you wish. I'm giving you three 50,000 dollars allowance and a whole month to enjoy it with,"** Giovanni continues, handing each member a bunch of brochures to various locations.

"**This is fantastic! James, Meowth, let's go shopping in prep for our trip!"** Jessie says to them with further excitement.

"**Right!"** both males responds simultaneous as they then exit out of the office.

Giovanni sighs after his employees leave the vicinity.

"**It's about time I got someone to take up these vacation destinations. Dangerous they all may be, someone's got to use them after I paid a fortune to reserve plane tickets to these various places…"** he thought out loud.

**Viridian City Mall**

The Team Rocket trio arrives at Viridian City Mall a little while later. As they walked through the various parts of the large shopping center wondering what to buy first for their trips, they heard an announcement over the loud speakers.

"_**Attention Viridian City Mall shoppers! There is a huge sale off of souvenir Pokeballs located within Professor Oak's Antiques! Sale ends in five minutes, so buy one before its too late!"**_

"**Souvenir Pokeballs? Who would want that junk?"** James wondered out loud.

The ground around the trio suddenly started shaking violently. All three of them turn around to witness at least a hundred frantic shoppers stampeding their direction, all heading toward the store where the sale was being held.

"**Hey…! Whoa…! Wait…! Stop!!!"** Meowth says as he began backing away slowly.

His futile efforts to try and halt the massive crowds failed miserabley as the shoppers proceed to trample over Team Rocket without hesitation.

"**Ow…"** Jessie moans as she and the other two slowly tried to get up, their bodies stamped with footprints.

The mall's loudspeaker then came on once again with another announcement.

"_**Attention Viridian City Mall shoppers! We are having a massive clearance of epic proportions off of various football equipment in Hitmonlee's Sports Emporium, happening right now!"**_

"**Huh?!"** the trio said in unison as they turned and saw an oncoming charge of several big, burley, 300 pound football players rushing toward their direction, slamming into them like a freight train and crushing them under their weight.

After they had passed; Jessie, James, and Meowth lie on the floor twitching from the impact.

"**This…is…ridiculous!!!"** James managed to sputter.

Again, the mall's loudspeaker came on again with yet another announcement.

_"**Attention Viridian City Mall shoppers! Free food samples are being handed out for your Pokemon at Brock's Food Court, located directly behind the three individuals lying on the floor near the entrance!"**_

"**Oh you have GOT to be kidding me…!" **Meowth groans as he and his partners now see in front of them a horde of Pokemon of the extremely large variety crashing down the walkway toward their direction.

"**AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!"** all three of them yell as they are destroyed underneath the feet, claws, fins, bodies, and other various parts of the mass of Pokemon stomping over them.

* * *

**This, folks, is why I myself never go shopping during clearance sales, anytime, anywhere!!!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! Vacation fun awaits, so stay tuned!**


	22. 22: Ownage by Batman

Maybe Team Rocket should have done their vacation shopping online…oh well; I bet they wouldn't know how to use a computer anyways without it blowing up in their faces or something.

For this next chapter's subject, I needed help from the head hancho of our team of authors: Master Jin Sonata himself!

**From Sonata**: Muahahaha, let's have some fun!

This chapter is dedicated to Beta-ReaderADV in:

* * *

**#22) Ownage by Batman**

After a twelve-hour plane flight, Team Rocket finally arrives at the first vacation spot chosen by James: Gotham City. After exiting the plane and gathering their things, the three head out into the streets of the city blanketed in perpetual night.

"**Geez, this place doesn't necessarily scream out 'fun', doesn't it?"** Jessie says out loud, looking about the gloomy and barren streets.

"**Yeah, more like 'depressing' if you asks me,"** Meowth adds, looking at the travel guide to the city.

James steps in front of the two and stops them.

"**Now hold on a sec! I chose this spot because this city offers nighttime activities like clubs, dinners, and after-hour parties. Now cheer up you two, this is supposed to be a vacation, let's start it on a happy note, hmm?"** James says to them, trying to lighten the mood.

Suddenly, gunfire was heard in the distance, followed by the sound of an alarm from a nearby building.

"**Did that brochure of yours mention anything about fireworks or something? Sounds like something exciting is happening**," Meowth speculates out loud and pointing toward the skies as a golden strobe light with an outline of a bat was shining across the sky.

It wasn't long until the trio sees three men in ski masks rushing down the street toward their direction. The masked men stop and quickly shove several bags of stolen cash into the arms of the trio before running away.

"**What was that all about I wonder?"** Jessie asks out loud to no one in particular.

"**I don't know, I think they were the welcoming committee or something. We got ourselves some free stuff!"** James says, examining the bags he and his partners were holding.

Another surprise came their way…or in this case, drops down in front of them from above…

…the Dark Knight himself.

"**So you are the ones who robbed that bank,"** said an un-amused Batman to the trio.

"**Robbed…?"** James says with shock.

"…**Bank?"** Meowth echoes in surprise.

"**And from the looks of your uniforms, you must be in cahoots with the Joker or some other organization,"** Batman continues.

"**What?! Wait, no, you've got it all wrong here!"** Jessie protests.

"**Give me one good reason why I should believe you," **Batman asks them, arms crossed.

The trio looks at one another before turning back to the Caped Crusader with an answer.

"**Uh…we're on vacation?"** they all respond simultaneously with a cheesy smile.

Batman cracks his knuckles and proceeds to clobber the trio of suspected robbers.

"**Wrong answer."**

**BIFF! **

**SMACK!**

**POW!**

**SPLAT!**

**POP!**

**CRUNCH!**

…

……

………

**_WHAM!!!_**

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**Ouch! I'm pretty sure you can guess how this situation ends. Let's just say they lose half of their vacation funds bailing themselves out of jail.**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! Vacation fun continues, so stay tuned!**


	23. 23: Humiliation by Master Chief

Gotham City wasn't exactly a good place to start, right? Why not try somewhere…more exotic?

This chapter is dedicated to goldeneye101 in:

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**#23) Humiliation by Master Chief**

Taking the next flight out of Gotham as quickly as they could, Team Rocket boarded the first thing their money would let them…

…a military drop-ship.

The trio, who were asked to suit down in military combat uniforms, sat with several other individuals as they waited for the ship to land.

"**Um…guys…can I ask you something?"** Meowth says, looking up at the two from underneath his oversized helmet.

"**We already know what you are going to ask: why are we dressed up as if we've been drafted?"** James responds, adjusting his belt as he spoke.

"**Maybe we've just stumbled upon an in-flight war simulator,"** Jessie speculates out loud.

After they spoke, a man who looked to be a military leader walks down the isle and hands each person a rifle.

"**Wishful thinking…"** Meowth says as he is given a smaller sized gun.

"**All right soldiers, listen up! I am Sergeant Major Avery Junior Johnson! You are all new recruits of the UNSC Marine Corps! Your first mission is to infiltrate the enemy's complex once we land on the ancient space weapon called Halo!" **says the dark skinned man who smoked a cigar as he spoke. **"Your unit leader will be Master Chief! Don't give him any trouble, or he'll personally kick your ass!"**

"**Master…Chief?"** all three Team Rocket members echoed in unison, turning to the full-armored soldier sitting next to them.

**"...What are _you_ looking at?"** Master Chief says to them.

The ship they were on then landed. The hatch opens and the soldiers started piling out. The trio hesitantly follows them outside.

"**All right, the enemy is approaching us in the distance. You guys give me some cover,"** Master Chief tells his platoon.

Just as he had stated, the enemy could be seen in the horizon, charging toward their group ready to attack.

"**You there, start firing!"** Master Chief orders James.

"**Um…all right,"** Jamey responds, pulling the trigger of his gun to test it, only to shoot a bullet right into Master Chief's left shoulder. James jumped and dropped his gun. **"You mean these guns are actually loaded with live ammo?!"**

"**Yes you dumbass! Now watch where you are shooting,"** Master Chief responds irritably to James. **"You there, show him how its done,"** Master Chief orders Meowth.

"**I don't want to, but okay…"** Meowth says, taking aim past his leader.

Just as he was about to fire, his oversized helmet falls over his eyes, causing Meowth to miss and cap Master Chief in the ass instead.

"**That's it!!! I'm teaching you incompetent soldiers to mess with the Chief,"** Master Chief says, pulling out a handgun as he proceeds to pistol-whip Team Rocket in front of the other soldiers.

"**Damn…hate to be those morons right now…"** Sergeant Johnson comments with a chuckle from the entrance of the drop-ship.

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**And I though the military had its benefits…but not for these three!**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! Vacation fun continues, so stay tuned!**


	24. 24: Death Within Raccoon City

Joining the military wasn't exactly part of the team's activity list, so what will they do next during their vacation?

This chapter is dedicated to the spirit of Halloween in:

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**#24) Death Within Raccoon City **

After going missing in action within the Halo universe, Team rocket manages to slip onto a transport ship and travel to a new destination. However, along the way, not realizing that the trio were within the cargo bay, gets ejected from the ship, sending them falling into a dumpster in some dark city alley.

"**Blegh! Some ride that was!"** Meowth says as he crawls out of the dumpster, spitting a piece of garbage out of his mouth.

"**I'll say. Where are we now?"** James asks, stepping out behind Meowth.

Jessie notices a sign in the distance while she exits the dumpster last. **"It reads 'Raccoon City'."**

"**Raccoon City? I don't recall a place like this in those brochures our boss gave us…"** James speculates.

"**Looks pretty…gloomy, doesn't it?"** Meowth points out.

As the trio steps out of the alley, they witness the city around them in chaos. Cars were on fire, barricades were set out in the streets, and it was like a great conflict happened recently. Not to mention it was completed deserted.

"**I don't like the looks of this place. I'm getting that bad feeling again like when that Batman guy approached us in Gotham…"** Meowth said, a bit nervous.

"**Okay, nobody panic, let's just go to the local authorities and ask for directions out of here,"** Jessie suggests.

Wasting no time searching the city for the police station, they find it a few blocks down and enter it.

It was dark and deserted just like the outside.

"**Hello! Anyone here?!"** James calls out to the dark.

They hear a faint moaning noise from the second floor. Heading upstairs to investigate, they find a wounded police officer sitting against a wall.

"**Ugh…thank god…someone here is still alive,"** said the police officer.

"**What in the world happened to you? Better yet, what the heck is wrong with this city?!"** Jessie asks.

"**This city was infected with the T-Virus, turning the population into zombies. I was attacked by one earlier,"** the police officer responds. **"You guys must get out of here while you still can!"**

"**We should take you with us, you know the city better than we do. Wait here, we'll find you a first aid kit!"** James tells the man.

The trio turns their backs and step away for a few moments then stop as they wanted to ask the police officer one more thing.

"**Oh yeah, by the way…where can we…"** Meowth began as he and his teammates looked behind them.

The police officer was gone.

"**Where did…he go?!"** James said, completely freaked at how fast the officer had suddenly disappeared.

"**I don't know…let's just get out of here!"** Jessie insists.

All three rush toward the door they were heading to on the back wall of the police station.

James grabbed the handle, and slowly opened th…

**RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUGHH!!!!**

The very police officer that disappeared suddenly tore through the door, completely zombified and out of control from the other side as he began to maul all three Team Rocket members limb by limb.

Nobody heard their screams.

**

* * *

**

ALTERNATE ENDING!!!

* * *

The trio turns their backs and step away for a few moments then stop as they wanted to ask the police officer one more thing.

"**Oh yeah, by the way…where can we…"** Meowth began as he and his teammates looked behind them.

The police officer was gone.

"**Where did…he go?!"** James said, completely freaked at how fast the officer had suddenly disappeared.

"**I don't know…let's just get out of here!"** Jessie insists.

All three rush toward the door they were heading to on the back wall of the police station.

James grabbed the handle, and opened the door.

Another dark hallway lay before them.

As they slowly made their way down the hall, someone else appeared from around the corner.

It was Leon S. Kennedy.

"**Woah!!!!"** yelled Leon as he began to fire his handgun at each member, killing them instantly per shot. **"Goddamn it… just killed some innocents. Stupid zombie police officer scaring the shit out of me a minute ago, had to shoot him down and now this happens. I wish Jill were here…"** he said, sighing heavily as he turned away and left the scene.

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**Zombies and Leon…bad thing to get in between if I do say so myself.**

**Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! Vacation fun continues, so stay tuned!**

**Happy Halloween!!!**


	25. 25: Humiliation by Severus Snape

I'm sure by now Team Rocket will stay clear away from dark, scary, post-apocalyptic-like cities, huh?

This chapter is dedicated to the author Beta-ReaderADV in:

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**#25) Humiliation by Severus Snape **

Our three heroes, who look like they've been through hell and back seven-times-over, somehow made it out of Raccoon City alive, and were on the next flight to somewhere else nicer and brighter.

"**Why do we have the worst luck ever?"** James mumbles as he sat next to the plane's window.

"**Come on, we still have a decent amount of money left, let's try to make the most of it the next place we go,"** said Meowth, trying to instill a bit of confidence into the group.

"**I sure hope so…"** Jessie said as she was re-bandaging her zombie wounds.

Seconds later, a tall, slender, and pale middle-aged man stops by the trio, and looks down at them, particularly Meowth.

It was Professor Severus Snape.

"**That cat is in my seat,"** Snape said coldly to them.

"**Oh yeah? And so what? Go sit somewhere else, pasty-face!"** Meowth says to Snape.

Snape raised an eyebrow.

"**A talking cat, is it? I bet you and your cohorts are spies from 'he-who-must-not-be-named',"** Snape accuses.

"**Wait, what? What in the world are you talking about? Beat it!"** James tells Snape.

Professor Snape reacts by taking out his wand.

"**Oh look, this guy is a magician, he's going to make us disappear or something!"** Jessie muses, snickering with the others at the notion.

"**I've had enough of these in-flight shenanigans. Take this!"** Snape proclaims frustratingly, zapping his wand at each member of Team Rocket blowing the area around them up with his transformation spell.

Later after the plane had landed at their next destination, Professor Snape was seen stepping off first.

Behind him were an ugly retarded-looking donkey (James), a fat chunk of Swiss-cheese (Jessie), and a Magikarp (Meowth).

"**I hope that guy's name gets on a no-fly list,"** said a disgruntled James.

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**Snape's on a plane…didn't see that coming!**

**For those who didn't know, this episode is a homage to another fic of ours called Reasons Why Severus Snape Is On The No Fly List. Check it out! ****Please review, and keep those suggestions coming! Vacation fun continues, so stay tuned!****  
**


	26. 26: Death by Master Chief

Team Rocket should watch whom they mess with…especially scary emo wizards.

This chapter is from yours truly in:

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**#26) Death by Master Chief **

After stepping off of the airplane, Team Rocket attempts to head to somewhere safe where they could strategize how they wanted to spend the rest of their vacation.

This didn't last long as a military vehicle suddenly drives up to them. It was a warthog, and out of it steps Master Chief, whom they encountered earlier in their vacation.

"**Hold it right there!"** Master Chief says, approaching the trio with his gun pointed at them. All three members easily surrendered as they held up their arms in the air.

"**Oh no, its that pistol-whipping, tea-bagging military guy again!" **James muttered nervously to his allies.

"**Damn straight. Desertion from the military is not tolerated. Your little act of escaping from our grasp a few days ago can result in jail time. However, I'm feeling a little nice today," **Master Chief says to them.

"**A **_**little**_** nice?" **Meowth responds, eyebrows raised.

"**You heard me. Now, get in the Warthog,"** Master Chief instructs them.

"**Warthog? That gross, why would we climb inside of an anim----"** Jessie questions.

"**JUST GET IN THE DAMN TRUCK!!!"** Master Chief says angrily to them, shooting his gun at the ground where they stood, forcing them to immediately piled into the vehicle.

**Later… **

Master Chief drives Team Rocket to an undisclosed location far away from civilization. Stopping in front of an abandoned facility, Master Chief escorts them inside.

"**So what exactly do we have to do to avoid jail time?"** James asks.

"**You are to assist me in the eradication of the Flood,"** Master Chief tells them.

"**The flood? What's that?"** Jessie asks.

"**It's an alien virus-like species that wreaks havoc over anything they touch, causing destruction to the masses,"** Master Chief explains as he hands each of them an assault rifle.

They travel down a quiet and eerie hallway, stopping in front of a large door.

"**Some vacation this is…"** Meowth mutters to the others.

"**Well...I suppose we could count this as seeing strange foreign places others normally can't,"** James says.

"**James…shut up,"** Jessie says, rolling her eyes.

"**Okay, quiet you three. You guys step inside this room and search for any sign of those little green bastards. If you see them, kill them,"** Master Chief says, opening the doors, shoving them inside, and shutting it behind them.

Alone in the large, dimly lit room, the trio slowly walks about the area.

It was silent.

Just about to wrap up their search, Meowth began to get a tingle in his nose.

"**Ah…aaah……………………………….AAACHOOOOO!!!!!!"**

Almost immediately, thousands of green alien-like things began to fill the room, slipping in through cracks and shaft openings, surrounding the trio in seconds.

**Back Outside **

On the other side of the door, Master Chief meanwhile was contacting his war buddy, Sergeant Johnson.

"**So how are those three morons handling things on your mission?"** Johnson asks.

"**They should be finishing their work soon,"** Master Chief responds.

**"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!"**

Master Chief looks up from his communicator and turns to the door, hearing Team Rocket scream and panic while being utterly disembowel from the inside. He turns back to his communicator.

"**Yep. Mission accomplish sir,"** Master Chief says.

* * *

**Master Chief always finishes his job. Always.**

**Please review! Vacation fun continues, so stay tuned!**


	27. 27: Ownage by Twilight Fangirls

Master Chief had his way with Team Rocket, but what they will run into next will be one of their worst!

This chapter is dedicated to the author Amethyst Turtle and anonymous reader ChocolateLover in:

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**#27) Ownage by Twilight Fangirls**

* * *

After escaping certain doom from the mission with Master Chief deep in an unknown land, they spend the next several hours wandering through the forest, looking very beat up and mangled.

"**Have we reached civilization yet? I could really go for a Band-Aid right now,"** said Meowth, whom James carried in his arms.

"**How would we know? I just want to get to a telephone so we can call for a cab to take us away from here,"** Jessie responds, sluggishly moving along with the others.

"**This vacation is getting worse and worse by the day…I'd rather be back chasing Ash and his pals…"** James adds.

As if their prayers were answered, the trio came upon a sign that seemed to lead to a nearby town. They stop in front of it and read it together.

"**Welcome to Forks, Washington…"** said the three villains, their spirits becoming a bit uplifted.

After investigating a bit further down the path, they arrive in the city limits, which overlooked a peaceful looking town.

"**This place doesn't seem that bad,"** James said, observing the area.

"**Not to mention that there seems to be nothing here that could harm us at first glance,"** Jessie says. **"Now to find a place to rest…"**

It was getting dark, and the trio spots two individuals near a quiet area of the road, a teenage girl and a pale-skinned young man, none other than Bella and Edward.

"**Hey, let's ask those two guys,"** Meowth suggests.

Agreeing with his notion, the three of them approach the two, who seemed to be in the middle of a romantic scene.

"**I know what you are…you're a vampire,"** said the girl.

"**Will you run from me then?"** said the young man.

"**No, I won't,"** the girl said, looking confident and more interested in him at every second.

"**Bella…you are my life now…"** the young man began to say to her, until they were both suddenly interrupted.

"**Hey twerps! Can you give us some directions around here?"** Jessie asks them.

"**Who are you creeps?"** Edward says to them, not taking their upfront attitudes and disheveled looks too kindly.

"**I'd ask the same to you. Did you forget to eat breakfast or something, you're all pale and stuff…"** Meowth says to Edward.

"**HEY! YOU LEAVE THOSE TWO ALONE!!!"** came an angry shout behind them.

"**Huh?"** Team Rocket responds simultaneously as they turn around.

The unfortunate threesome found themselves standing before thousands upon thousands of teen girls, all wearing t-shirts, caps, and books that all had the words 'Twilight' and/or 'BellaxEdward Forever' written on them.

Standing at the front of the mass were three familiar faces: Misty, Dawn, and May.

"**What the?! Where did all of you suddenly come from?" **James asks, completely weirded out at their sudden appearance.

"**We're the creators of the Twilight Fan Club, and you three jerks are ruining a touching scene between the two main characters!"** Misty says to them angrily.

"**Let's shove our books into their ass!"** Dawn proclaims to all of her followers.

"…**Did she just say 'ass'---?"** Jessie said in a confused tone.

**"Oh crap! First Pikachu fangirls now this?!!?"** Meowth says, looking pretty freaked at the moment.

Before long Team Rocket become lost in a sea of rabid fangirls. Bella and Edward look upon the massacre for a moment, before turning to each other again and embracing for a kiss as if nothing happened.

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**Yep, had to do it, 'twas a long time comin'!**

**Please review! Vacation fun continues, so stay tuned!**


	28. 28: Humiliation by Looney Tunes

Twilight is an interesting series to say the least. Not an avid fan of it, but it's all right in small dosages.

Any who, this chapter is dedicated to the anonymous reader Monogatari in:

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**#28) Humiliation by Looney Tunes Characters**

Fleeing from the clutches of the locust-like sea of Twilight fangirls, Jessie and Meowth managed to escape certain doom, however, James was nowhere to be found. Lying down on the cold ground, exhausted from the ordeal, the two remaining allies contemplate what to do next at this point.

"**Poor James…no tellin' what happened to him back there in that crazy town,"** Meowth says to Jessie.

"**And we've yet to have a chance to get a hold of a telephone,"** Jessie responds to him. **"If we could, we could call for a search crew or something."**

As the two continued to converse to one another about their next course of action, they heard footsteps nearby. Both of them sat up, and couldn't believe what they saw.

"**Hey Jessie, Meowth! I've found you!" **

It was none other than their partner James, looking alive and well.

"**It's you! But…but how did you…?"** Jessie said, shocked and very happy to see him again.

"**I was nearly a goner back in that town, but this odd little fellow here helped me escape, isn't that right, Elmer?"** James said to them.

"**Huh? Elmer?"** said both Jessie and Meowth.

Out from behind James, the cartoon hunter Elmer Fudd steps into view.

"**Hello there, heheheheheheh. I was in town getting some hunting supplies so I can catch me some dinner in this here forwest, when I wan into this fellow"** he explains.

"**Wow, even Meowth talks better than this egghead…"** Jessie whispers to James.

Everyone in the group then heard some bantering not too far away from them. It was coming from the other side of the shrubbery.

"**Oh boy! That must be my pwey! Excuse me, but could you two stay here while I shoot me some game?"** Elmer says as gets his gun ready and proceeds through the bushes toward the noise.

"**Uh, sure, no problem,"** said James, curious as to what the hunter was about to do.

"**Hey, why don't we spy on him? Maybe this 'prey' he mentioned could be worth catching for ourselves,"** Jessie suggests.

"**Right!"** both Meowth and James agrees together.

* * *

**Forest Clearing**

In the clearing of the of the forest, several dozen signs where nailed to various trees, pointing to a rabbit hole in the ground. All of the signs read 'Rabbit Season' or 'Rabbit This Way'. Setting up the last sign closest to the hole was Daffy Duck.

**Daffy**: Hohoho, contrary to what these signs read, it's actually Duck Season, but I'm not getting shot, you hear?

(Elmer Fudd enters the scene just after Daffy goes to hide, pointing his gun down at the rabbit hole

**Elmer**: Alwight wabbit, come out and say your pwayers!

(Bugs Bunny rises out of his hole, eating a carrot)

**Bugs**: Eh, what's up doc?

**Elmer**: You are! Now pwepare to be blasted!

(Bugs munches on this carrot casually before speaking again)

**Bugs**: Eh, hate to break it to you, but it's not Rabbit Season.

**Elmer**: It's not?

**Bugs**: Nope. It's actually Duck Season.

(At that moment, Daffy appears out of nowhere and marches up to the two to intervene.)

* * *

**Meanwhile…**

Team Rocket watch the events unfold, and took great interest in both Bugs and Daffy, who assumed them to be rare yet-to-be-discovered Pokemon.

"**Look at those two creatures! I've never seen anything like them before!"** James said, looking on with binoculars.

"**I bet if we capture those two animals before that hunter takes them out, we could sell them to the boss and become millionaires overnight!"** Jessie dreams out loud.

"**Then us three could take all the vacations in the world!"** Meowth adds. **"Not to mention get a chance to sit on the boss's lap in place of that stupid Persian of his."**

"**Well, what are we waiting for? Let's catch them!"** James said, as he and Jessie ready their Pokeballs.

* * *

**Back With The Cartoon Characters…**

**Daffy**: Now wait just a cotton-picking moment! I know for a fact what correct season this is!

**Bugs**: Would that be Duck Season, my feathered friend?

**Daffy** (Half paying-attention): Yeah that's right!

**Elmer**: You positive?

**Daffy**: Of course I'm positive! Just shoot already!

(Elmar shrugs and aims his gun at Daffy as Team Rocket jumps out into the open)

**Team Rocket**: Hold it right there!!! Prepare for trouble!!!

(Just as Elmer fires his gun, Daffy, for the first time ever, dodges the blast, sending the bullets straight at Team Rocket and blowing them away)

**Elmer**: What the..?!

**Bugs**: For shame, doc, shooting innocent bystanders.

**Daffy**: You moron! I didn't mean to imply it was Duck Seaon! I meant to say…

**Bugs**: Duck Season?

**Daffy**: No!!! Rabbit Season!!!

**Bugs**: Duck Season.

**Daffy**: Rabbit Season!!!

**Bugs**: …Rabbit Season.

**Daffy**: Duck Season, FIRE!!!

(Elmer pulls the trigger just as Team Rocket arose from the initial blast, their faces black with soot. Before they knew what hit them, Elmer fires another shot at Daffy, misses, and caps the members of Team Rocket yet again.)

**Elmer**: This is all become a little confusing…

**Bugs**: Don't worry doc, I'll make it very simple for you to understand…Rabbit…

**Daffy** (Jumping the gun): DUCK, FIRE!!!!

**Team Rocket** (Getting off the ground again): NO, DON'T FIR----!!!

_**BLAM!!! **__**BLAM!!! **__**BLAM!!! **__**BLAM!!! **__**BLAM!!! **__**BLAM!!! **__**BLAM!!! **__**BLAM!!! **__**BLAM!!!**_

This whole incident, in nearly the same repeat pattern, continued throughout the entire night until daybreak, with Team Rocket continuing to be on the receiving end of Elmer Fudd's shotgun.

(Cue the 'end of cartoon' fanfare)

**Porky Pig**: That's all folks!

* * *

**Just when you thought the story couldn't get any sillier! Muahaha…**

**Please review! Vacation fun continues, so stay tuned!**


	29. 29: Team R vs Butch & Cassidy: Part 1

Who says cartoon violence is too much nowadays? Keepin' it classy by the classic toons.

This next chapter is dedicated to the author readeradv in:

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**#29) Team Rocket vs Butch & Cassidy: Part 1**

**

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**

It was hours after the folly within the forest, and the trio found themselves trudging alongside an abandoned highway.

"**Next time we have a vacation…let's just stay home, huh?"** James suggests as he walks along with his hands dug into his pockets.

"**Meowth…I don't even want to think about vacationing anymore,"** Meowth said with a tired look.

"**How long until we get to civilization?"** Jessie inquires in a rather bored tone.

It was then the three heard a noise in the distance. The three stop and watch in curiosity as a convertible car with two persons inside drive up toward them and top by their side.

It was their rival team: Butch and Cassidy.

"**Well well if it isn't the three stooges! Fancy meeting you guys in the middle of nowhere. What are you doing, looking for useless things in this useless place?"** Butch says to them in a snarky attitude.

"**Oh shut up Biff! For your information we're on vacation right now!"** James shot back at Butch in annoyance.

"**My name is Butch dammit! When will people get my name right?"** Butch says in anger, responding to Jame's incorrect reference to his name.

"**Don't listen to these losers, Bill, we got more important things to do,"** Cassidy says to her partner.

"**I swear…I'm changing my name…"** Butch muttered in a defeated tone as he sunk down in his seat.

"**And just what are you two doing here in the middle of nowhere?"** Meowth questions.

"**Well if you must know, me and Billy are just finishing up a vacation of our own. We went to an exotic island where we got massages and pampering by the islanders. It was quite heavenly,"** Cassidy explains, rubbing the details in.

"**On top of that, while we were messing around on the sandy beach, and we think we came across an ultra rare Pokemon!"** Butch adds. **"We don't know what's inside of it, but we're gonna show it to the boss and become millionaires, and possibly partnering positions with Giovanni for our hard work!"**

The Team Rocket trio's jaws hit the ground with a thud after hearing the details of their much better vacation, and to add insult to injury, a possible rare Pokemon in their repertoire.

"**Rare Pokemon? Where is it?"** James demands.

Cassidy reaches down in the seat next to her and pulls out a gold-colored Pokeball, showing it to the trio, just in arm's reach before setting it back down. **"Well, if we're done talking here, we are going to go become the greatest Team Rocket agents in history! Buh-bye!"**

The two rivals sped off seconds later, leaving a cloud of dust behind in the faces of our three antagonists.

"**Gyah! I can't stand those two! Why do they always have better luck than us?" **James said as he shook his fists in discontent.

"**Yeah! I hope those two get a flat tire or something, right Jessie?"** Meowth says to her.

Jessie didn't respond.

An odd and eerie air surrounded her as she had her back turned toward the two.

"**Jessie? Are you okay?"** James asks, wondering what was up with her.

Jessie slowly turns around, a scary raging fire within her eyes.

Both guys jumped at the sight of her. Jessie grabs both of them and smiles menacingly.

"**I…am…SICK…of coming in last in EVERYTHING! We…are going…to show those two…that our Team Rocket branch…WILL NOT STAY DEFEATED ANYMORE!"** she hisses at them both.

Both James and Meowth looked as though they were about to shit themselves from fear.

But, at the same time, they knew what Jessie had in mind.

It was time for them to one-up Butch and Cassidy.

* * *

**BREAKING NEWS!**

**Uh oh…things are gonna get rough now!**

**Even more so…Team Rocket is about to do something you haven't seen in this fic yet…**

…**they are gonna fight back, and hard!**

**Please review! The encounter continues in the next chapter. Stay tuned!**


	30. 30: Team R vs Butch & Cassidy: Part 2

**It's Team Rocket chaos in the next chapter titled:**

* * *

**#30) Team Rocket vs Butch & Cassidy: Part 2**

Butch and Cassidy roared down the lonely desert road, speeding back toward the city to present Giovanni with their golden Pokeball. After they left our trio of villains in the dust, the black uniformed duo throughout they were in the clear.

So they thought…

"**Hahaha, finally we'll be able to do as we please once we cash in this beaut to our boss, right Cassidy?"** Butch said with a devious laugh.

"**You said it. I bet Jessie and her two idiotic partners will be working as grunts for the next fifty years due to their incompetence,"** Cassidy responds.

As the two yucked it up, suddenly something fell onto their car's hood.

It was a Voltorb…

…and it was about to explode.

"**OH CRAP!"** both Butch and Cassidy yells simultaneously as their vehicle is then engulfed in a bright light.

**KABLAAAAAAAM!**

Their car explodes after the Voltorb detonates, sending them flying into the air, and landing on the ground just off the side of the highway. Smoking and smoldering from the blast, the two Team Rocket members crawl away from the accident.

"**Ow…what just happened?" **Cassidy coughs.

"**I don't know…but thank goodness our golden Pokeball is safe,"** Butch responds, taking their prized possession out of his pants pocket.

"_**Not anymore it isn't!"**_

Both Butch and Cassidy look up to see Jessie, James and Meowth standing not too far away from them.

"**Hey! Are you the ones who blew up our car?"** Cassidy demands, as she and Butch quickly hop up onto their feet.

"**Maybe…maybe not. Now hand over that gold Pokeball right this instant!"** Jessie demands.

"**Never! I don't know how you managed to catch up to us, but you're gonna have to pry it out of my cold hands you jerks!"** Butch answers, his fists raised on the offensive.

"**That can be arranged,"** James said, putting his dukes up as well.

For no apparent reason, a fighting-game life bar shows up over each guy's head as they prepared to brawl.

* * *

**Round 1…FIG****HT!**

**

* * *

**

James pulls out a regular Pokeball and tosses it, summoning Arbok. He grabs Arbok and uses it like a whip, wrapping Butch by the arm and slinging him hard into a large rock. Butch quickly recovers as advances upon James, striking him three times with physical blows, and then he pulls out a Staryu and flings it like a shuriken, whacking James upside the head. James shakes off the attack and rushes toward Butch, sliding down on the ground and wrapping his legs around his opponent, then proceeds to slam him back and forth onto the ground.

"**That's it, its time to finish this!"** Butch sneers as he grabs James and proceeds to run toward a nearby mile-high cliff and hurls them both off of it.

As they both fell, they continued to exchange attacks with each other, trying to gain the upper hand in the fight.

Back up top the cliff, Jessie was left to deal with Cassidy.

"**Give it up, you'll lose for sure with me around!"** Jessie warns Cassidy.

"**That's what you think, creep,"** Cassidy responds as she pulls out a large rocket launcher.

"**Is that the best you got?"** Jessie ask, seemingly not impressed.

"**Damn right, toots. Now prepare to die!"** Cassidy says, aiming her giant weapon at her arch-rival.

Jessie whips out a walkie-talkie at the last second and spoke into it.

"**NOW!"** she commands.

Before she could fire, Cassidy was suddenly being assault by gunfire from the distance. She drops her launcher and scrambles away while shrieking like a schoolgirl, dodging the bullets along the way.

After that little fiasco, John Wilkes Booth, Dick Cheney, and Lee Harvey Oswald approach Jessie.

"**Thanks for the backup guys,"** Jessie says to them, paying the three men a ton of cash.

"**Anytime ma'am. We'll assist anyone for a quick buck,"** Booth responds as they then take off on their own merry way.

Minutes later James re-emerges onto the scene, carrying the Golden Pokeball in his hand.

"**I finally got it off of Butch. Did you take care of Cassidy?"** James asks, huffing from the fight he had just won.

"**Yeah, she ran away with her tails between her legs,"** Jessie responds with relief.

Meowth approaches his teammates from their air balloon seconds later.

"**Okay, let's get out of here guys! To the boss we go!"** Meowth calls out to them.

* * *

**Well well, they had finally succeeded in something throughout this story, but will their luck last?"**

**Please review! The encounter continues in the next chapter. Stay tuned!**


	31. 31: Humiliation and Ownage by ? ! ? !

Jessie, James, and Meowth arrive in Viridian City that same evening, and promptly return to Team Rocket HQ, where they request an immediate audience by their boss Giovanni.

"**Ah, you three are finally back. Did you enjoy your vacation?"** Giovanna asks them as they step inside his office, stroking his Persian who always lay on his lap.

"**Well…despite some annoying interferences, I think the venture was well worth it,"** Jessie tells her boss.

"**Oh? What makes you say that?"** Giovanni asks.

The trio looks at each other, nods, then reveals the golden Pokeball to Giovanni.

"**Check this out, boss, we've found this rare Pokeball while we were vacationing,"** James lied as he presents it to him.

Giovanni's eyes opened wide in surprise, especially since this would be the first time the trio has presented them something of potential worth and interest.

"**Well well, you've done well to find something that looks of rare value,"** he said, taking it and examining it. **"Have you found out what's inside?"** Giovanni inquires.

"**Not yet boss-man. We figured we give you the honor of unveiling its contents,"** Meowth says to him with a wink.

Giovanni grins and stands from his desk, his Persian hopping down onto the floor next to him. **"Well then, let's see what reward you guys will be going home with once I release what's within."**

The trio stood excited and giddy with anticipation. It appeared their proactive determination and going the extra mile would finally allow them to get what they wanted.

"_**Yes, finally, riches beyond our wildest dreams!"**_ Jessie daydreams to herself.

"_**We may get a huge promotion if this turns out to be a rare Pokemon,"**_ James contemplates with happiness.

"_**Finally, I'll get my rightful place on the boss's lap and have that dang Persian kicked out the door!"**_ Meowth imagines with pure bliss.

Gripping the ball tight, Giovanni rears back and tosses the golden Pokeball toward the open portion of his office. It flips open, and out of it materializes the most bizarre thing they had ever witnessed…

* * *

**#31) Humiliation and Ownege by…?**

Team Rocket stood in complete horror, whereas their boss stared with a 'WTF' expression. Standing before them was none other than the famous singer Rick Astley.

(80's Music starts playing as Rick begins to sing and dance to his favorite tune)

**We're no strangers to love…**  
**You know the rules ... and so do I…**  
**A full commitment's what I'm ... thinkin' of…**  
**You wouldn't get this from any other guy…**  
**I…just wanna tell you how I'm feeling…**  
**Gotta make you ... understand…**

**Never gonna give you up,**  
**Never gonna let you down,**  
**Never gonna run around and desert you**  
**Never gonna make you cry,**  
**Never gonna say goodbye,**  
**Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you.**

Team Rocket was speechless. They all turned their heads slowly toward their boss, who had the scariest face you've ever seen…as if he was about to murder them on the spot for this fallacy.

In fact, they were exactly right…

**BLAM!**

**BLAM!**

**BLAM!**

…as Giovanni reaches for his pistol from within his desk and shoots all three of his grunts on the spot.

"**I've had about **_**enough**_** of your goddamn incompetence! You three are fired from Team Rocket Inc, EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY!"** Giovanni yells, storming out of his office in a huff, with his Persian not too far behind him.

Rick Astley stands there and simply scratches his head at the brutal scene, and instead of helping them; he goes back to his song and dance.

* * *

**Wow…Team Rocket is now out of the job (and out of commission at the moment for that matter…). Now they will have to find work elsewhere with other factions…**

**Please review, faithful readers! Keep sending in those ideas as we begin the next arc!**


	32. 32: Ownage by Darth Vader

Team Rocket is now out of the job! What will they do now? This chapter is dedicated to the author sithlorde198 titled:

* * *

**#32) Ownage by Darth Vader**

* * *

Several days later, we find the Team Rocket trio within James's family mansion, huddled around a small table frantically scouring over the newspaper want-ads looking for a new job, since they were canned from Team Rocket Inc.

"**Man this totally blows! If we don't find a new career soon, I won't have enough money to keep buying more hair-gel,"** Jessie said with a loud sigh as she thumbs through page-after-page of classifieds.

**"Not to mention the loss of catnip rations on my part,"** Meowth adds.

"**Come now, Meowth, there are more important things right now instead of your kitty-crack,"** James responds to his feline partner.

"**Like what?"** Jessie and Meowth ask simultaneously.

"**Like paying mother and father rent-money before they kick us out of my own home,"** James responds with a slight dejected laugh.

After many more minutes of intense browsing, Meowth finds something that catches his eye.

"**Hey you two, check this out,"** Meowth says, showing a flyer to both of his pals**. "Some organization known as the Galactic Empire are hiring at the moment. They offer great benefits, and it says we get to see many worlds!"**

"**Hmm…it's worth a shot I suppose,"** James says, agreeing to the idea.

"**Where do we need to apply?"** Jessie asks.

* * *

**The Death Star**

* * *

A while later, the Team Rocket trio travels to a galaxy far-far away and arrive at a place known as The Death Star. Once inside, they are escorted to the inner sanctum to meet with their would-be boss.

"**Sir, the three new recruits are here for the 11:30 interview,"** said one of the captains.

Behind the captain were our heroes, all decked out in storm-trooper uniforms, minus the helmets.

A large spherical machine opens, and from within steps out the almighty Darth Vader. He breathes heavily as he approaches to get a better look at the potential grunts.

"**So…what makes you three think you are soldier-material for the Empire?"** the intimidating Vader questions.

"**Um…well, for starters…we've dedicated our whole lives to crime and kidnapping of Pokemon,"** Jessie replies.

"**Pokemon…what are these…Pokemon?"** Darth Vader demands.

"**They're creatures on our world used for battling and breeding,"** Meowth responds.

"**I have no need for peons who run underground cock-fights. My officers will make hardened soldiers out of you three. The question is…are you dedicated in forfeiting your own morals and beliefs and work for the Dark Side?"** Vader asks.

"**Um…as long as we don't outright slaughter our enemies without forethought**," James responds with a slightly nervous laugh.

_"**I don't like where this is going…"**_ Meowth whispers to Jessie.

"**And what does _that_ supposed to mean?"** Vader questions James, as well as the other two.

"**Well you see…even we have standards when it comes to…"** Jessie butts in, trying to fix the situation.

Her words, along with James and Meowth, were cut short when Darth Vader began using his Force-Choke powers on all three of them.

"**I find your lack of faith disturbing. I have no need for you,"** Vader says to them as he progresses with the squeezing of their necks.

Thinking fast, James pulls out Pokeball and tosses it at Darth Vader, knocking him upside the helmet.

This provided the adequate distraction needed for all three of them to be released from his grasp and flee the scene.

"**Let's get out of here!"** all three of them yell as they scramble out of the chambers.

After recovering, Darth Vader pulls out his lightsaber and unleashes it.

"**Hunting time…" **he says, tossing his weapon like a boomerang straight at the fleeing trio with uncanny accuracy.

We'll leave it to your imaginations on how this would end. n_n

* * *

**It appears Tem Rocket's resumes weren't pleasing enough to the Empire. What will happen to them next?  
A new saga of job-themed chapters is coming! Keep sending in those suggestions and stay tuned, loyal fans, or be Force-Choked as well!**


	33. 33: Death by Sonic The Hedgehog

A friend of mine asked me how did Team Rocket travel to the Star Wars universe in the first place? I playfully poked her on the forehead, smiled, and told her to never-ever over-analyze my fics, for I retcon the hell out of this story and break a lot of freakin' rules!

Heheh, anywho, this next chapter is dedicated to the author The Finesseful X in the next chapter titled:

* * *

**#33) Death by Sonic The Hedgehog**

* * *

Somehow avoiding certain death by the hands of Darth Vader and his thousands of soldiers, our heroes return to James's family mansion to recuperate and plan their next move. After stripping out of their stormtrooper uniforms, they gathered back around the table and began going through the ads once again.

"**Okay okay, so that job was a huge cat-tastrophy, we'll find something better!"** Meowth said to both his partners, who gave him an evil look every so often in between searches.

"**We need to find something that's safer, and still within our experience range,"** Jessie spoke.

"**True, but who exactly is going to hire a rag-tag group like us with our history?"** James commented, looking up from his paper.

More time had passed, and Meowth finds another intriguing advertisement within his stack of papers.

"**Hey guys, I think I found another job we could apply for!"** he says to them both.

Both Jessie and James look at one another, and then back at Meowth.

"**Alright, we'll give you one more chance. Where do we apply?"** James asks.

* * *

**Dr.**** Ivo (Eggman) Robotnik's Headquarters**

* * *

Our three unemployed heroes arrive at a heavily mechanized fortress. A pair of robots, whose nametags read 'Scratch and Grounder', escorts them inside to their boss's office. Before them was a rather portly man with sunglasses and a large mustache.

"**Ah, so you must be my new henchmen for hire?" **Dr. Robotnik says upon meeting them.

"**That's us. So, we read you're looking for a few good persons to take care of a hedgehog problem you have?"** Jessie inquires.

"**Yes, his name is Sonic, and I hate that hedgehog more than anything! Your jobs will be to exterminate it! You'll be rewarded handsomely if you succeed," **Dr. Robotnik tells them.

Just then, several alarms began blaring all over the complex.

"**What's going on?"** James asks their new boss.

"**My sensors detect that Sonic is here on my property somewhere, snoo**_**ping as **_**usually I see. Go get into my battle mechas and take him out, pronto!"** Dr. Robotnik instructs them.

"**Yes sir!"** Team Rocket answers before heading toward the armory to prepare for battle.

* * *

**Outside The Headquarters**

* * *

Jessie, James, and Meowth, each in their own egg-shaped flying capsule, fly outside of the complex, where they immediately see their target running around and bashing other machines trying to stop him. Sonic screeches to a halt and takes notice in these three newbies closing in on him.

"**Woah, what do we got here? Looks like Ro-butt-nik is churning out even more goons as of late. So, which one of you wants to play first?"** Sonic asks, taunting them in the process.

"**Hey James, this doesn't look like any ordinary Hedgehog, it can even talk like Meowth!"** Jessie says to her partner.

"**You're right, let me consult the Pokedex,"** James says, pulling it out of his pocket and aiming it at their target.

* * *

**Pokedex-**

"_**Sonic The Hedgehog, a Speed type specimen. Extremely agile and possessing an adventurous persona, this bipedal talking hedgehog is capable of reaching speeds of Mach 1. It also loves chilidogs and hates girls named Amy."**_

* * *

"**What?" This thing is lying! No way can that thing move that quick! He's mine!"** Meowth says as he presses a button on his mecha, which released a giant ball and chain from underneath. **"Take this!" **Meowth says, proceeding to swing his machine around to force the ball and chain to hit Sonic.

This plan fails as Sonic merely sidesteps the attack, allowing the ball to swing up and smash Meowth's cockpit, ultimately causing his entire machine to explode.

"**Man, wake me up when you guys actually start trying,"** Sonic says, waggling his finger at the remaining two.

"**You little runt! Eat this"** Jessie says frustratingly as she uses her machine to begin firing several laser beams at Sonic.

Sonic counters by dodging all of her shots, running rings around her.

When Jessie's laser's ran out of juice, she stops and comes to the realization that she had shot and blown up James's machine in midst of the chaotic chain fire.

"**You're too slooowwww!"** Sonic calls out to her, running in place, as if asking her to try and shoot an immobile target.

"**You little…you little!"** Jessie growls angrily, trying to press other buttons in an attempt to fire something else at it.

While she did, Sonic proceeded to Light-Dash himself into her mecha, ramming into it with enough force to damage it. He continued to do this six more times.

"**What the heck are you doing? Quit hitting my machine!"** Jessie yells. **"What are you trying to do, wreck it?"**

Sonic smiles and leaps into the air, bashing into it for the eighth time.

"**Yep!"** Sonic replies.

**KABLAAAM!**

The eighth impact caused Jessie's mecha to explode. Sonic salutes his three defeated enemies and takes off running away from Robotnik's complex. His job was complete. As for Team Rocket, well...

* * *

**I had fun with this chapter! Sonic ftw! Keep sending in those suggestions and stay tuned!**


	34. 34: Death by Megatron

Tee-hee, let's continue with the next chapter, inspired by the author Jarkes, titled:

* * *

**#34) Death by Megatron**

Yesterday, being a complete failure on multiple levels, did not dampen the spirits of our three protagonists. The next day, Team Rocket found themselves at a used car dealership.

"**Why are we here again?"** Jessie asks James.

"**We've spent a fortune on bus fare and other modes of public transportation when we traveled to our last two job interviews. I think its more economical if we bought ourselves a car," **James explains.

"**Yeah but in this dump-yard? I don't think we'll find any good cars here,"** Meowth says o'contraire.

Without warning, a yellow Chevrolet Camaro drives up to them, as if picking them to be its driver.

All three members look at each other in a weirded-out way, seeing that nobody was driving the car that just drove up to them.

"…**Well this doesn't look too bad. Should we buy it?"** Jessie asks, a bit reluctant.

"**I guess it could be alright…let's just find the owner of this place and ask him it we could b-" **James responds, only to be cut off.

The ground around them began to shake violently as a large shadow then looms over them all. They turn around and look up.

Megatron, leader of the Decepticons, was staring right back at them.

"**Um…hi?"** James said to the not-so-nice looking giant robot.

"**YOU THREE ARE HARBORING AN AUTOBOT NAMED BUMBLEBEE. I WILL NOW HAVE THE PLEASURE OF DESTROYING YOU,"** Megatron tells them.

All three of them looked as if they were about to wet themselves. Meowth scoots over and whispers to his partners. _**"Quick, let's hop into this yellow car and get out of here!" **_he whispers to them.

**SCREEEEECH!**

Too, late, as the yellow car takes off with out them, fleeing the scene in a heartbeat.

"**H-HEY! COME BACK HERE YOU DUMB CAR!"** James shouts at the runway vehicle.

Their shouts of disdain was all for not, as Megatron's fist came crashing down on top of them a second later.

* * *

**(Sings horribly off-key)**

**Transformers, Robots in Disguise!**  
**Team Rocket, whom Megatron Despise!**

**(…Okay that was horrible I know…)**

**Please review, faithful readers and stay tuned for the next chapter!**


	35. 35: Death by Super Mario

May we rain upon Team Rocket's parade some more with a chapter a lot of readers have requested:

* * *

**#35) Death by Mario**

In the deep dungeons of one of Bowser's fortresses, we see the famous hero, Super Mario, hopping over the various traps and obstacles, until he reaches his ultimate destination at its end, where would fight Bowser and rescue the princess.

However…something was wrong…

There was nothing waiting for him. No sign of opposition…and once he reached where the princess was to be held, she was not there either. Instead…

"**Huh?"** Mario says as he sees a small, beat-up mail delivery truck drive up to him from the opposite end of the dungeon halls. Once it stops a few feet in front of him, our hard-luck heroes: Team Rocket, exits the vehicle and approaches him with a letter.

**"Delivery for Mr. Fatass?"** Meowth says, reading the front of the letter before handing it over to Mario.

"**It's-a Mario…"** Mario corrects him as he takes the letter and reads it out loud.

* * *

_**Dear Red Bastard,**_

_**Sorry, but the princess is in another castle.**_

_**Your arch-nemesis, Bowser  
**_

_**PS: RAWR! **_

* * *

As Mario stares at the letter near speechless, James approaches him with his hand held out.

"**That'll be $50 in delivery charges,"** James tells him.

"**But…but…that's-a impossible**!" Mario says, ignoring Jame's request. **"This is the eighth-a castle, I always defeat-a Bowser and rescue the princess in the eighth-a castle!"** Mario said, sounding a bit confused by the situation. Before they knew it, Mario began crumbling up the note and tossing it to the ground to stomp on it.

"**Um sir, will you just pay us so we can move on with our next delivery?"** Jessie asks Mario, sounding a bit impatient.

"**Shut-up! You don't-a know the half of it! For twenty-five-a years I have been saving Peach from that-a damn dinosaur! This is-a so frustrating!"** Mario says in a huff, turning beet red in the process.

"**Hey, don't blame us, we're just the messengers. Besides, this Bowser fellow told us directly that he's gotten smart over the numerous game installments and wanted you to suffer for thwarting his plans for all these years,"** Meowth tells Mario.

"**Yeah, in fact, I think I saw a Princess in his castle while we were there, coming out of his bedroom with a satisfied look on her face…"** James recalls out loud.

"…**Wait, so you guys are in-a cahoots with Bowser then?"** Mario said angrily as he began to advance upon the trio.

"**Whoa, whoa! Back off, chubby! We got a job to do, so just give us our cash and we'll be on our way**!" James says to him.

The trio continues to back away from Mario as the plumber just loses it, ranting and raving about how he was tired of this charade all these decades. Eventually, Mario stops getting into their faces as he stood next to a golden key stuck off in stone.

"**Huh? Why did he stop?"** James asks.

The trio looks around them, realizing that they were over a suspension bridge with a pool of boiling lava bubbling below them.

Mario, who now had a rather sinister look on his face, yanks the key out from the ground.

"**WAAAAAAHHHHH!"** the trio yells in unison as they plunge into the boiling hot lava with a splash.

Mario tosses away the key and storms off, muttering **"Screw-a this, Luigi can save that dumb-a broad if he wants, I'm going back to being a plumber in Brooklyn…"**

* * *

**Ahem...Haaaaaaad a feeling this would happen to Mario eventually. Talk about bad reaction to a change in protocol…**

**Please review, faithful readers and stay tuned for the next chapter!**


	36. 36: Ownage: Zelda Style

This next chapter is inspired by the author Taco Kickline in:

* * *

**#36) Ownage: Zelda Style**

After their mail delivery job failed horribly, our hard-luck heroes…er…_**villains**_ sit around in a castle in a magical kingdom called Hyrule. Apparently they responded to an ad the other day stating that this country was looking for heroes…

"**Gee, it sure is boring around here," **James said while stretching his arms high into the air.

Standing before them was a king-like figure, sipping wine from a goblet.

"**My boy, this peace is what all true warriors strive for," **the king responds.

"**I just wonder what that runt Ash and his Pikachu are up too…" **Meowth responds.

Just then, a wizard flies in on magic carpet.

"**Your majesty, Ganon and his minions have seized the island of Koridai," **the wizard states.

"**Hmm... How can we help?" **the king asks.

The wizard pulls a scroll out from his robe and shows it to them.

"**It is written: "Only Team Rocket can defeat Ganon"," **the wizard states.

"**Great! We'll grab our stuff!" **Jessie responds, as she and her team members jump up from their seats.

"**There is no time, your male friend and your talking cat are enough," **the wizard states.

As the trio heads to get on the wizard's flying carpet, Meowth stops in front of a young princess-like girl.

"**How about a kiss, for luck?"** Meowth asks her.

"**You've got to be kidding!"** the princess responds, turning away from him in disgust.

Once everyone was on board, they fly out of the castle and into the skies

"**Squadala! We're off"** the wizard announces as they take off toward the horizon.

* * *

Hours later, Team Rocket is dropped off in front of a large ancient temple. They step inside as instructed earlier and find a sword stuck upright in a stone pedestal.

It wasn't long too when an owl flies in the vicinity and perches itself just above them.

"**Greetings. I am The Wise Owl. You must be here fo****r the job I had listed online on Sheikslist,"** the owl inquires.

"**Yep, that's us! So, fill us in again on what we're supposed to be doing,"** Jessie asks.

"**Certainly. You see, our local hero, Link, broke his arm the other day and is unable to take the Master Sword you see before you, and use it to save the world from Ganon. So, in his place, you will be doing it,"** the Wise Owl explains.

"**Okay then. Long as it pays well, we'll do anything,"** James says as he proceeds to take the sword by the handle and yank it out without much trouble.

"**Congratulations! You are now the new heroes of Hyrule!" **the Wise Owl praises them.

A strange thing then happened, as a random chicken-like creature walks into the room and passes in front of Team Rocket.

"**Blegh, I hate chickens,"** Meowth says with a frown as he kicks it away from him.

The chicken, known as the Cucco, then suddenly becomes irate and starts clucking loudly. Within seconds, thousands upon thousands of Cuccos began swarming into the temple and surrounds the trio, all of them looking pretty pissed off.

"**Yaahh! Get away you crazy birds!"** James yelps as he swings away at some of the birds with the Master Sword, but none of them were dying.

"**Mr Owl! How many hits does it take to get rid of an angry group of ****kooky-cocks?"** Meowth asks, getting pretty scared at the situation.

"**Hmm…let's find out. A one…a two…a three…um…I forget…"** the Wise Owl responds.

"**What? You could have warned us about these things!****"** Jessie yells at him.

"**O RLY?"**the Owl responds, cocking its head to the side.

Having no more time to react, the mass of crazy birds all jump Team Rocket and start pecking them to death.

* * *

**Hey! Listen! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Listen! Hey! Listen! Hey! Hey! Listen!**

**Got your attention? Good. Please review, faithful readers, and stay tuned for the next chapter!**


	37. 37: Ownage: King of the Hill Style

The next chapter continues in:

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**#37) Ownage: King of the Hill Style**

On a nice sunny day down in Arlen Texas, seven individuals were standing in the alleyway having a beer.

"**Yep…"** says Hank Hill.

"**Mmm yep…"** replies Bill Dauterive.

"**Yep,"** Dale Gribble says.

"**Mmm hmm…"** Jeff Boomhauer responds

The disheveled trio, Team Rocket, who stood next to them, just let out a big exhausted sigh.

After a brief silence, Hank turns to them to ask them a question.

"**So uh…how goes the job search as of late fellas?"** Hank asks.

"**Terrible," **Meowth replies, taking a drink from his can of beer.

"**Well…I hear-tell you guys at one point were in the military. We could always use the help again,"** Bill says to them with an optimistic smile.

"**No, never again! I don't want to be pistol-whipped by that Master Chief guy again**," James replies with a frantic expression.

"**Well did you ever think about getting into the exterminator business? It pays good money,"** Dale asks them, whilst smoking his cigarette.

"**Forget it! We've already had a bad experience with chemicals and whatnot,"** Meowth replies, sticking out his tongue in disgust.

"**Yeah I tell ya what, man. That dang ol' job of mine. Texas Ranger business is where it's at, you just find criminals and then haul them in and if they retaliate you take your dang ol' shotgun point and pull. It's real easy, man,"** Boomhauer says to them.

**"Don't get us started on that subject…two words…Chuck Norris,"** Jessie muttered, downing her first can.

"**Well don't worry, we all fall down on hard times at some point, it happens to the best of us. You'll be back to work in no time I tell you what,"** Hank reassures them.

"**I hope so…"** all three of them say simultaneously.

Just then, Hank's neighbor, Kahn Souphanousinphone, peeks over the fence and starts yelling at them, well, at Team Rocket in particular.

"**Hey, hillbillies! Your nasty friend's cat left big mess in my yard! You'll pay for that!"** he says angrily at them, shaking his fist before disappearing back behind the fence.

Everyone looks at one another and shrugs.

"**Meowth, do you know what he's talking about?"** James questions Meowth.

Before Meowth could answer, Kahn reappears around the corner with a flamethrower.

"**Now you die, irresponsible cat owners!"** Kahn says as he unleashes the flames upon Team Rocket, setting them ablaze instantly.

"**Kahn, what the hell is your problem? Dale, find something to put them out!"** Hank says to them in shock.

"**On it, Hank,"** Dale says as she runs to his house's garage and comes out with a bucket of chemicals, proceeding to throw it onto the trio, which suddenly increases the blaze dramatically.

"**Dale you giblet-head, that's pesticide fluid!"** Hank yells at him.

"**Heheh…oops.."** Dale says with a nervous laugh, before running off to hide somewhere like a coward.

The rest of the guys would watch as Team Rocket burns to a crisp before they were able to find actual water to put them out.

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**Hank**: That whole thing was messed up I tell ya what.  
**Me**: Shut up, Hank.

**Please review, faithful readers, and stay tuned for the next chapter!**


	38. 38: Death by Itachi

The next chapter continues! This one is dedicated to the author Yurianna Shan Liu! This one is titled:

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**#38) Death by Itachi**

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Still finding no such luck in holding a job for more than ten seconds, our persevering trio applies for jobs in the far reaches of the land, near a wilderness community hidden in the leaves. Inside the settlement's main office, Jessie, James, and Meowth sat before the leader, who calls herself Lady Tsunade.

"**So…let me get this straight…you three are former members of a criminal syndicate whose sole purpose is the retrieval of rare monsters called Pokemon…?"** Lady Tsunade questions as she looks at her documents.

"**Uh…Meowth, that's right!"** Meowth responds, sitting in between his two partners, who twiddled their thumbs in hopes for this job to be granted to them.

It was a long shot, but hey, what other choice do they have?

"**I see…well, it appears that you are looking for redemption to pay for your crimes with honest work, so I'll give you a chance to see if my assumptions are correct. I am assigning you three to security duty effective immediately,"** Lady Tsunade proposes.

The trio looks at one another in joy that they got the job without a hitch.

At that moment, Kakashi, one of the village's squad leaders, enters the room.

"**Report! Itachi Uchiha has been sighted in other neighboring regions surrounding our nation,"** Kakashi speaks.

"**What?! That's preposterous, Itachi Uchiha has been dead for quite some time now,"** Lady Tsunade responds, skeptical of the report.

"**His death might have been a ploy. Knowing his organization, the real Itachi might as well still be alive,"** Kakashi continues.

"…**Hmm…very well, we will beef up security then until I get more information on this issue,"** Lady Tsunade responds.

"**Who is this Itachi person you speak of anyways?"** Jessie asks.

"**He is a member of the Akatsuki clan, a dangerous ensemble of rogue individuals who plot and kill for their own agenda. Not to worry though, you should be fine on your security duties. Now go, our secretary will provide you with your uniforms,"** Lady Tsunade states, dismissing them out of her office.

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**An Hour Later**

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Standing at the main entrance to the Hidden Leaf Village, our three heroes stand watch, decked out in their cool looking new ninja gear.

"**You know, this job isn't all that bad I must admit,"** James states, twirling a kunai that was issued to him.

"**I'd have to agree. This is a pretty peaceful little settlement. The people aren't all that bad; the atmosphere is calm and laid back…who would want to invade this place?"** Jessie questions.

"**Tell me about it! This might be the easiest job we've landed in a long time!"** Meowth comments.

Before the trio would continue their peaceful patrol, all three of them were suddenly warped to a strange dimension. This new realm, drenched in red and grey overtones, replaced the reality they were just in. To make matters worse, all three of them were also shackled onto three separate vertical walls made of stone.

Dumbfounded to the point of not being able to get a word out, they are then confronted by none other than Itachi Uchiha himself, along with several dozen clones of himself surrounding the vicinity.

"**Ahh! What is going on here?!"** James manages to blurt out.

"**I am Itachi. You three are guarding the Hidden Leaf Village, and I consider you the biggest threat of anyone there,"** Itachi says to them, his cold eyes staring at them.

"**Huh?! Why us? We don't even know you!"** Jessie proclaims in panic.

"**That may be true, but the fact is…I know who **_**you**_** three are. You see, I am a huge Pokemon fan…and my favorite Pokemon is the one you three constantly try to harass and capture,"** Itachi reveals. **"Now it's time to pay for your crimes. Using my Tsukuyomi technique, I have brought you here to my realm of nightmares. I will now stab at you for the next seventy-hours, for time in this world is but a split second in reality."**

All three members scream in utter fright as they are fricasseed and tortured beyond all reason.

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**Watched out for crazed Pikachu fanboys, they do exist out there!**

**Please review, faithful readers, and stay tuned for the next chapter!**


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